A salute to all stay-at-home parents!

[mommy2_3]

awww thank you! i have been a stay at home mommy for the past 4yrs. as much as i love my babies, all 3 of them, i cant wait till they are all in school so i can work! i never thought i would say that! DH tried saying i had the easy job till i left him home, with just the 2 older kids for the day. hasnt said a word on how easy i have it since!

 

[mickeymaniac77]

That's very sweet of you, thanks!

 

[DesertGal]

Thanks. This really made my day. I made the decision to stay at home when our son was born 3 years ago. We now have another darling daughter, and I'm still at home (even though financially, it would be better for me to work). I feel like I work so much harder than I ever did at my job. Some days, as I try to take a bathroom break (along with both kids AND the dog), and do the grocery shopping, cleaning, bathing, laundry, cooking, etc., I sometimes need an extra pat on the back.

Having said that, I do think that a working parent has struggles as well, and I marvel at how they balance everything because I would think a working parent would want to spend all of their "free" time with kids but "need" to do the cooking, cleaning, etc.

I am paid with kisses and hugs, and am fortunate enough to not miss anything my kids do, and I know I wouldn't trade that for anything, even though I sometimes don't appreciate it as much as I should. I love that I can just stop what I'm doing, and watch my kids play or listen to their laughs and giggles.

 

[kidtink]

Thank you for posting this. I am a SAHM, but I have also been a working mom. Staying at home is much harder. I began staying home when my the birth of my 4th child coincided with husband getting a new job in a new state. Needless to say, I think it makes things harder that I don't know anyone and don't have an "in-town" support service (besides my wonderful husband).

 

[KELLY]

Thank you...this is coming from a mom of 3 kids who is babysittiing 4 others for the summer. It's crazy!

This is me also. I have 2 kids and my youngest is about to send me over the edge. I love her so but my oldest is just so easy going compared to her. I really needed this today!!

 

[bdoyledimou]

My DH is a SAHD so you are not the only one. When our DD18 months was born, he quit his job to stay home and I swear that man is a saint. He takes great care of our two kiddos, does all the cleaning, cooking, grocery shopping...everything! I am so appreciative of everything he does and try to let him know that as much as I can. He actually is a member of a SAHD group and they meet several times a month for playgroups and such...that's been great. Anyway, thanks to all you SAHMs and SAHDs...you definitely have the more difficult job.

Give him a big High 5 from North of the Border! it's tough out there! People look at you weird and whisper. Around here there is no group for the dads...

 

[rparmfamily]

I've done both and I think being a working mom is WAY harder. You have to work and then do everything the stay at mom does in a fraction of the time.

I've been a working mom and a stay at home mom and I think being a stay at home mom is a million times easier and honestly not exhausting or hard at all.

Oh I think being a SAHP is totally exhausting, I wasn't this tired when I worked LOL! My 14 mo is busy busy busy and sometimes I daydream of taking her to daycare and working again, just to get that break from her! I don't think as working mom I did as much housework, because the house stayed clean more, I had less dirty dishes,etc because we were out of the house all day long. I did stay up late everynight getting things ready for the next day, and the rush in the morning and evenings was tough, but as a SAHM I do those too anyway, plus all the non-stop housework in the daytime from having 3 kids home all day.

Though when I worked I had the major stress of not being to be in 2 places at once, I loved my job, then someone was sick, or it was "Muffins with Mom" day at school, or an art show during school hours, etc. Sometimes you just can't do it all. That was hard for me to realize.

We are military and also have no family support, so maybe matters.

Both are tough for sure!

 

[Kitikat]

I wanted to say Thanks and give props to all parents. I have been a SAHM since I had my second child ,he will be 17y end of aug. DH & I decided it was cheaper for me to stay home then pay daycare. It hasn't always been easy and money has been tight at times...i used to get the question "are you going to work after my youngest started school?" well I kinda did. We moved into a building built in 1904 that we are renovating. So besides cooking and shopping and laundry I am also painting and tearing down walls and drywalling and the list goes on and on.
My children are just as demanding as they were when they were younger now it's just different things.
To the poster about eating vegetarian. We have a saying in our house 3 sides make a meal.

 

[2Tiggies]

as much as i love my babies, all 3 of them, i cant wait till they are all in school so i can work!

I think depending on the kind of person you are, some of us need the balance. I found I was exhausted and although mentally drained, sometimes it felt like the left side of my brain was screaming: "FEED ME ...... PLEEEEEEEESE!" Part of it, (I wonder) may have to do with what you did before you became a parent and whether you had your kids early or later in life. I was nearly 30. Now that is not old,I guess, but it did mean that I had a good 12 years of studying, career and generally a fast paced (relatively selfish ) life. It was a shock to my system on all counts. I loved my time with my baby but I am a better parent when it isn't the ONLY thing I do, if you know what I mean.

Having said that, I do think that a working parent has struggles as well, and I marvel at how they balance everything because I would think a working parent would want to spend all of their "free" time with kids but "need" to do the cooking, cleaning, etc.
.

I can only speak for myself, but as a working mom, my house is not as tidy as I would like it to be. Something has to give.

This is me also. I have 2 kids and my youngest is about to send me over the edge. I love her so but my oldest is just so easy going compared to her. I really needed this today!!

 

[disneyjunkie]

THIS!

For me, I give working moms props...I think it's very hard to juggle working and the family/home. I tried, I was so stressed out.

I've done both and I think being a working mom is WAY harder. You have to work and then do everything the stay at mom does in a fraction of the time.

I've been a working mom and a stay at home mom and I think being a stay at home mom is a million times easier and honestly not exhausting or hard at all.

As a single parent my only option was to work. Was it easy? No, but it isn't impossible. You make it work.

I salute ALL parents.

 

[ilovesugar]

Oh I think being a SAHP is totally exhausting, I wasn't this tired when I worked LOL! My 14 mo is busy busy busy and sometimes I daydream of taking her to daycare and working again, just to get that break from her! I don't think as working mom I did as much housework, because the house stayed clean more, I had less dirty dishes,etc because we were out of the house all day long. I did stay up late everynight getting things ready for the next day, and the rush in the morning and evenings was tough, but as a SAHM I do those too anyway, plus all the non-stop housework in the daytime from having 3 kids home all day.

Though when I worked I had the major stress of not being to be in 2 places at once, I loved my job, then someone was sick, or it was "Muffins with Mom" day at school, or an art show during school hours, etc. Sometimes you just can't do it all. That was hard for me to realize.

We are military and also have no family support, so maybe matters.

Both are tough for sure!

I guess my life sucks BIG TIME right now. I am a working mom who works 40 hours a week. I also have 2 kids who stay at home during the day with my niece who babysits them. Soooo the house is a complete disaster when I get home because two kids have been there all day messing it up. There are dishes in the sink from 2 meals that have been eaten at home and more laundry that has to be done because they have changed clothes at least twice during the day because of running in the sprinklers or having a blowout.

I get up at 6, take a shower get out the door at 7:30, work 8 hours, come home, clean the house, do the laundry, do the dishes (from the day meals), cook dinner, attempt to spend time with both my kids, do baths, put kids to bed, wash bottles, clean up the kitchen from the evening meal and at about 10:00, I can sit down.

So yeah - I think right now I work harder than I have ever worked in my life.

 

[Leajess99]

Thank you OP. I love being at SAHM as I know how much I missed when my older 2 were young and I was on Active Duty. I am and have been a single parent for a very, very long time. I do miss working sometimes and I so hate the comments that I get from some people. I had one person tell me yesterday that it must be nice to be able to put my kids in different activities. That comment actually pissed me off because even when I was on Active duty my kids were involved in sports and such. This person works 5 hours in the early morning and her hubby is out of work currently. The funniest part is that her kids are in scouts and soccer. My youngest does soccer and now cross country for her elementary school. My middle one does soccer and other school related clubs that take place at school. My oldest does ROTC and all the extras with that so I am constantly running someone somewhere but the biggest thing is as long as my kids are having fun and staying physically active, I will do whatever I have to for them.

For all the single parents out there, believe it or not your kids will realize and probably already do realize all that you have to give up for them. Thank you for being there for your kids and not giving up or making excuses. My mom gave up so much for us kids after my dad passed away and she was one to always put us first. I try to do the same with my kids and have seen many more do the same for their kids.

 

[wasnotafan]

I'm thankful that DW has been able to stay at home. First year that we will have both kids in school and not homeschooling. I know some people have no choice, but to those that do, they are missing out. We only get a short time to spend with the kids so we try to make the most of it.

 

[ccgirl]

Thank you OP. I love being at SAHM as I know how much I missed when my older 2 were young and I was on Active Duty. I am and have been a single parent for a very, very long time. I do miss working sometimes and I so hate the comments that I get from some people. I had one person tell me yesterday that it must be nice to be able to put my kids in different activities. That comment actually pissed me off because even when I was on Active duty my kids were involved in sports and such. This person works 5 hours in the early morning and her hubby is out of work currently. The funniest part is that her kids are in scouts and soccer. My youngest does soccer and now cross country for her elementary school. My middle one does soccer and other school related clubs that take place at school. My oldest does ROTC and all the extras with that so I am constantly running someone somewhere but the biggest thing is as long as my kids are having fun and staying physically active, I will do whatever I have to for them.

For all the single parents out there, believe it or not your kids will realize and probably already do realize all that you have to give up for them. Thank you for being there for your kids and not giving up or making excuses. My mom gave up so much for us kids after my dad passed away and she was one to always put us first. I try to do the same with my kids and have seen many more do the same for their kids.

Just wanted to thank you so much for your service. I can't even imagine how difficult that was for you. My mom was a single mom and she showed me just what strength, love and perserverance will/can do. She made me such a strong individual and I will be forever grateful.

It is hard being a parent SAH/working. My hat is off to all parents!

 

[2Tiggies]

It is hard being a parent SAH/working. My hat is off to all parents!

I have to be honest, the week I have had at work over the last 7 days, there were moments when I thought back fondly to the days when I was at home with DD as a baby. Not from a work at work/work in the office perspective - but all the same. I am very thankful for the overjoyed greeting and hug I get from my DD when I get home from work at the end of the day. I love my job, but this last week, all day hugs would have been nice.

 

[sjsjbrook]

Thanks OP. I am a stay at home mom of 4, (16, 8,7 and 9months)too for almost 9 years now. I wouldn't trade a minute of it for anything in the world.

the house continuously got messy during the day, although I was always cleaning and I struggled to get the food shopping done,

I want to say that this quote made my day. This describes my house. I have started to call my house "LIVED IN" We definately are getting our moneys worth in this house, rarely is it empty.


Though my DD8 says to me quite often "Can't we go to daycare?" She just doesn't know how good she has it. LOL

Never a dull moment in our house that is for sure.

 

[ilovesugar]

I'm thankful that DW has been able to stay at home. First year that we will have both kids in school and not homeschooling. I know some people have no choice, but to those that do, they are missing out. We only get a short time to spend with the kids so we try to make the most of it.

Rude. It is comments like this that spark the problems these threads always have.

 

[2Tiggies]

We definately are getting our moneys worth in this house, rarely is it empty.

Well this just made my day!

 

[hoosiergirl7]

Thank you! My sister (whom I love dearly BTW) is single and just doesn't get it. She thinks I sit around all day watching my kids play. Little does she know exactly how exhausting it really is to have to care for the house and the kids. It's not easy cleaning the house when you're constantly having to break up spats between your kids or keep them from doing things they shouldn't.

I'm sure there are other parents out there that like me at around 4 pm say, "Only 3 1/2 hours until bedtime!" That is the time of day I look forward to most because it's quiet! Granted it doesn't mean my day stops then. I try and accomplish all the little tasks that I couldn't get done while the kids had me occupied. Thankfully, school starts for my 6 yr old next week so I'll only have one at home and it will be a bit less stressful.

Oh, and I definitely have days where I would gladly switch places with my husband and go to work in his place just to have some peace!

 

[2Tiggies]

Thank you! My sister (whom I love dearly BTW) is single and just doesn't get it. She thinks I sit around all day watching my kids play. Little does she know exactly how exhausting it really is to have to care for the house and the kids. It's not easy cleaning the house when you're constantly having to break up spats between your kids or keep them from doing things they shouldn't.

Some people don't get it if they haven't been there themselves. How do you explain to someone just how crazy it is on a continuous basis?! When DD was a few weeks old my ex DH kept asking me what I did with all my free time around the house and whether I didn't get bored sitting about. He seemed oblivious to the fact that I had skipped so many nights of sleep and that I wasn't in my pyjamas because I'd had an early bath - I hadn't had time to get dressed all day by the time he got home from work. After a few more weeks I was exhausted, lonely and frustrated. He got home from work in the evening and dinner wasn't there and I did nothing the whole day. He walked in and immediately went:"Man, what the heck happened in here today?!" So I told him, "You know how you ask what I do at home all day? Well today I didn't do it!" He understood from there. Okay, I had gone and bought microwave meals because I wouldn't really leave him hungry at the end of a long day at work, but it certainly seemed to get the point across. The thing is, he wasn't trying to be cruel. He just genuinely had no idea because he wasn't there all day to see how it was. It doesn't make you feel good, but it helps if you can accept that they are not criticizing you intentionally - they just don't understand.