Family not excited, looking for recommendations

[Darth Insidious]

Great, go on a trip your husband is "not excited" about for 10 days then. It's your 8K and your family.

I'd rather split the difference and go to the beach for half in circumstances like this.

You are cramming five humans including two teenagers in a small room for 10 days in one of the most crowded, loud, overwhelming environments on earth, which you know is challenging for your husband. Even the pools at Disney are a lot. That's your decision, but it isn't one I would make.

There is a lot of middle ground here, like him leaving early, or making the trip shorter, or going somewhere else for half of it, or staying in a 2BR at the Wyndham with the lazy river, or going with your friend instead, or a million other choices. It's not like the choices are 10 days or 0.

You’re making a lot of wrong assumptions here, which I find interesting. I have said he might go back to the hotel early. He doesn’t want to leave Disney early if that’s what you mean. I’ve said several times we are staying at Shades of Green which is notoriously much more quiet, pools included. Nowhere did I say I was cramming 5 people in a room. It’s a 2 bedroom suite. Why would you make these assumptions? You’re just looking for reasons to criticize or attack me and they aren’t even correct!

Maybe you should spend some time thinking about why you are reacting this way. It’s really mean and also entirely unnecessary to keep coming back and hurling insults at a stranger looking for recommendations. If you don’t have anything nice to say, maybe consider not saying anything at all?

 

[Darth Insidious]

In 2019, my husband and I met a Cm who told us how he works to help guests with PTSD minimize their stress while visiting the parks. I believe you can call Disability Services - at 407-560-2547. You can also email @ disabilityservices@disneyparks.com. I don't know if this would be helpful to you, but it seems to be a great resource.

Thank you so much! I will give them a call.

 

[Darth Insidious]

I also have a disabled vet husband. Splitting up is the way to go. I go early with some kids that choose and are LETS GO like me, some kids choose to stay behind and sleep in and take a way slower pace with dad. We meet up in the afternoon. Everyone is much happier this way. He also enjoyed SOG because it was so quiet and spacious.

Thank you so much. That’s really helpful. I’m really excited about SOG!

Any particular activities that your family enjoys at Disney?

 

[RoseGold]

Maybe you should spend some time thinking about why you are reacting this way. It’s really mean and also entirely unnecessary to keep coming back and hurling insults at a stranger looking for recommendations. If you don’t have anything nice to say, maybe consider not saying anything at all?

I said no insults at all actually, and this is the first time you even mentioned a suite, which seems kind of relevant for the issues you are facing and maybe something you should have mentioned?

There are still a lot of options that I would at least discuss with him, but it's clear you are going to do what you want. So I'm not sure why you asked for advice?

WDW is more crowded and chaotic than you went. It is not like the "old days." There is no "off peak." People are paying more, and it is more crowded. Since Covid, people are ruder and more entitled and more on edge. It's a lot. If crowds are his issue, it is going to be worse than you remember, and there will be no respite. I really recommend you watch some Youtuber park visit videos with him, so you understand what you are walking into.

 

[nw6675]

Another wife of a disabled vet here. He does not love Disney by any stretch, but also goes on my and DD's behalf. He would never want us to go alone- trust me, I've offered We take it super slow and are flexible with park reservations and dining. In May, it was so relaxed because we just went with the flow and the seat of our pants - so much better than the trips I had planned out to the nth degree. One difference is my DH won't stay at SOG because he wants to get away. That's just personal preference on our part. We wouldn't survive 10 days, even relaxed. We've left a day early our last 2 trips. But, every family is different and only you two know what works best. Lots of great suggestions so far!

 

[TinkAgainU]

If he liked the theming at Rainforest, and anyone in the family likes dinosaurs - Disney Springs has the T-Rex Restaurant which you can reserve on the App. It is similar to Rainforest - loud and a lot going on. I Love Disney Springs at night with all the lights shining on the water and music playing (usually not super loud) - but be aware Rainforest Cafe has a super loud volcano that explodes at night - very fun to watch but you'd want to be sure anyone with PTSD knew it was going to be going off a few times each night.

As to dining reservations - I would make a few (especially set up the BoG if going) - there is a $10 per person cancellation fee if you do not cancel within 2 hours (or maybe the day before - I think it changes). Easy to cancel on your phone, and helpful to have stuff booked at that 60 day mark. Personally, I like to book a quiet breakfast after everyone else is in the parks and maybe a couple dinners (like Boma at Animal Kingdom after sunset so you can watch the animals from the lobby first, then sit by the firepit afterwards). I tend book twice as many as what I keep - I like to be flexible, but hate if all the reservations are for 9pm by the time I think to book.

 

[Darth Insidious]

Another wife of a disabled vet here. He does not love Disney by any stretch, but also goes on my and DD's behalf. He would never want us to go alone- trust me, I've offered We take it super slow and are flexible with park reservations and dining. In May, it was so relaxed because we just went with the flow and the seat of our pants - so much better than the trips I had planned out to the nth degree. One difference is my DH won't stay at SOG because he wants to get away. That's just personal preference on our part. We wouldn't survive 10 days, even relaxed. We've left a day early our last 2 trips. But, every family is different and only you two know what works best. Lots of great suggestions so far!

Thank you! There have been some fantastic suggestions so far. If you have any more pointers, please share.

I did try to pitch a quick trip with just me and the youngest and the other three were quite adamantly against it. I know for him, he doesn’t like the idea of us being that far away and something bad could potentially happen. So we get a nice hotel room and he can be close by if he chooses to leave early.

How did you just sort of spur of the moment do things without spending the whole day with him miserable stuck in line? I’m sure DAS could help us with that some. I will do more research on making good use of that. I’m trying to remind myself it’s not how much we get done but how much they enjoy it. Except Galaxy’s Edge. I want to do it all Hopefully they’ll enjoy it though. I don’t want anyone to be miserable.

 

[Darth Insidious]

If he liked the theming at Rainforest, and anyone in the family likes dinosaurs - Disney Springs has the T-Rex Restaurant which you can reserve on the App. It is similar to Rainforest - loud and a lot going on. I Love Disney Springs at night with all the lights shining on the water and music playing (usually not super loud) - but be aware Rainforest Cafe has a super loud volcano that explodes at night - very fun to watch but you'd want to be sure anyone with PTSD knew it was going to be going off a few times each night.

I thought he would have hated Rainforest because it was crowded but I guess it was the kids’ reactions? Or maybe he legit just liked the theme.

I’ll check out T-Rex. Thank you! My older daughter loves dinosaurs.

 

[Darth Insidious]

If he liked the theming at Rainforest, and anyone in the family likes dinosaurs - Disney Springs has the T-Rex Restaurant which you can reserve on the App. It is similar to Rainforest - loud and a lot going on. I Love Disney Springs at night with all the lights shining on the water and music playing (usually not super loud) - but be aware Rainforest Cafe has a super loud volcano that explodes at night - very fun to watch but you'd want to be sure anyone with PTSD knew it was going to be going off a few times each night.

As to dining reservations - I would make a few (especially set up the BoG if going) - there is a $10 per person cancellation fee if you do not cancel within 2 hours (or maybe the day before - I think it changes). Easy to cancel on your phone, and helpful to have stuff booked at that 60 day mark. Personally, I like to book a quiet breakfast after everyone else is in the parks and maybe a couple dinners (like Boma at Animal Kingdom after sunset so you can watch the animals from the lobby first, then sit by the firepit afterwards). I tend book twice as many as what I keep - I like to be flexible, but hate if all the reservations are for 9pm by the time I think to book.

Missed the second half. Sorry!

Boma would probably be a good fit too. Thank you. Check out the animals before or after, good food. That’s enough of an activity for a non park day.

 

[nw6675]

Thank you! There have been some fantastic suggestions so far. If you have any more pointers, please share.

I did try to pitch a quick trip with just me and the youngest and the other three were quite adamantly against it. I know for him, he doesn’t like the idea of us being that far away and something bad could potentially happen. So we get a nice hotel room and he can be close by if he chooses to leave early.

How did you just sort of spur of the moment do things without spending the whole day with him miserable stuck in line? I’m sure DAS could help us with that some. I will do more research on making good use of that. I’m trying to remind myself it’s not how much we get done but how much they enjoy it. Except Galaxy’s Edge. I want to do it all Hopefully they’ll enjoy it though. I don’t want anyone to be miserable.

G+ was included in the military tickets when we last went so that helped a lot. We will purchase G+ for some days if still a thing in Nov. We also did ILLs almost every day. We stacked rides for later in the day since we aren't rope droppers either. We didn't do late nights. No, we didn't ride everything since we've been so often, but we did what we wanted late afternoon and early evening. Pool in the morning several days - nice, not too crowded.

Our best day was when on a whim we left Epcot in the evening, hopped on the skyliner, ended up going to DHS not too long before close. Almost everything was walk on and it was magical!

We rent DVC points and almost always have a 1 or 2 br. Great to be so close to MK or Epcot and just as easy to escape!

The VIP tour suggestion is really cool. We were never lucky enough to get one booked, but I hear nothing but rave reviews.

 

[Darth Insidious]

G+ was included in the military tickets when we last went so that helped a lot. We will purchase G+ for some days if still a thing in Nov. We also did ILLs almost every day. We stacked rides for later in the day since we aren't rope droppers either. We didn't do late nights. No, we didn't ride everything since we've been so often, but we did what we wanted late afternoon and early evening. Pool in the morning several days - nice, not too crowded.

Our best day was when on a whim we left Epcot in the evening, hopped on the skyliner, ended up going to DHS not too long before close. Almost everything was walk on and it was magical!

We rent DVC points and almost always have a 1 or 2 br. Great to be so close to MK or Epcot and just as easy to escape!

The VIP tour suggestion is really cool. We were never lucky enough to get one booked, but I hear nothing but rave reviews.

Thank you.

 

[Mackenzie Click-Mickelson]

LOL, casual ableism. I don't personally know anyone, including myself, who would want to be at WDW that long. And I'm a superfan. I'd say the same thing for any reluctant person being dragged on a ten day WDW slog. Especially if it's five people in a hotel room the whole time, which I think it is? OP's husband has a lot of legit reasons why this is not a great pick for him, so I can't even wrap my brain around staying that long.

And yes, Disney superfans drag a lot of non-Disney people around who don't want to go or probably shouldn't go for many reasons. The pixie dust is strong.

There's a lot in between dragging the whole family for 10 days and not going.

There are times where I highly would suggest a different type of vacation when someone creates a thread somewhere along these lines but for the OP they are

• extremely willing to go with the flow
• extremely willing to eat financial costs if they book something and it doesn't pan out
• extremely willing to let some or all go off and back to the hotel to do their own thing or in the parks do their own thing
• extremely willing to think of all members of their traveling party

And they seem to know that the trip will work enough with their family to go. I don't think they are thinking the trip will be all pixie dust either although posters giving advice can totally help. Vlogs are very helpful but the only downside is they are a moment in time, sometimes it's a popcorn bucket that got released and so all the videos are showing is massive lines to get that lol but they aren't showing how the parks are. Or when Splash had its last weekend MK was nutty but wouldn't have been that bad had that not been the situation.

I put a lot of emphasis on extremely by the way because that is exactly how the OP is coming off. Yes the parks are more crowded and the situation different than when they last went but they do seem very willing to take that and work with it.

I actually think the 10 days would be more beneficial because it eases the stress of getting it all in. Stress of seeing it all, getting it all done and in the amount of days allotted tends to bring out the worst in people. So if the OP's husband thinks 10 days will allow him to more freely come and go and get out of the environment more easily but come back to it to enjoy time with his family that seems doable to me.

 

[SleepyDeb]

I'm sorry, I haven't read all of the replies already, so forgive me if this is a repeat.

We went to WDW for 3 days last month. Supposedly low crowd days. First time since Jan 2020. The planning needed now is completely ridiculous. I had said several years ago that a week in WDW in one hotel took more planning than 2 weeks in Ireland where we were changing hotels every other night. I'd now say double that. I'm a uber planner and the 3 days last month weren't even fun because of it. If I had to decide this moment, I'd say we're not going to go again unless some of the required planning (esp needing to stay up until midnight to buy LL and then book the LL at 7 am) go away. Of course, when I've recovered I may change my mind.

There's no way to "Do" the high and medium demand stuff at Disney without planning, esp BBB, CRT, and BoG. Maybe you could do the planning yourself and then eat the cost if you have to cancel?

 

[Darth Insidious]

There are times where I highly would suggest a different type of vacation when someone creates a thread somewhere along these lines but for the OP they are

• extremely willing to go with the flow
• extremely willing to eat financial costs if they book something and it doesn't pan out
• extremely willing to let some or all go off and back to the hotel to do their own thing or in the parks do their own thing
• extremely willing to think of all members of their traveling party

And they seem to know that the trip will work enough with their family to go. I don't think they are thinking the trip will be all pixie dust either although posters giving advice can totally help. Vlogs are very helpful but the only downside is they are a moment in time, sometimes it's a popcorn bucket that got released and so all the videos are showing is massive lines to get that lol but they aren't showing how the parks are. Or when Splash had its last weekend MK was nutty but wouldn't have been that bad had that not been the situation.

I put a lot of emphasis on extremely by the way because that is exactly how the OP is coming off. Yes the parks are more crowded and the situation different than when they last went but they do seem very willing to take that and work with it.

I actually think the 10 days would be more beneficial because it eases the stress of getting it all in. Stress of seeing it all, getting it all done and in the amount of days allotted tends to bring out the worst in people. So if the OP's husband thinks 10 days will allow him to more freely come and go and get out of the environment more easily but come back to it to enjoy time with his family that seems doable to me.

Thank you for the support.

 

[Darth Insidious]

I'm sorry, I haven't read all of the replies already, so forgive me if this is a repeat.

We went to WDW for 3 days last month. Supposedly low crowd days. First time since Jan 2020. The planning needed now is completely ridiculous. I had said several years ago that a week in WDW in one hotel took more planning than 2 weeks in Ireland where we were changing hotels every other night. I'd now say double that. I'm a uber planner and the 3 days last month weren't even fun because of it. If I had to decide this moment, I'd say we're not going to go again unless some of the required planning (esp needing to stay up until midnight to buy LL and then book the LL at 7 am) go away. Of course, when I've recovered I may change my mind.

There's no way to "Do" the high and medium demand stuff at Disney without planning, esp BBB, CRT, and BoG. Maybe you could do the planning yourself and then eat the cost if you have to cancel?

Thanks. That’s sort of what I’m thinking. Honestly with BBB I’ll just take the little one unless she’s the one who’s not feeling it (highly unlikely). The other stuff is nice and I’d be disappointed with some things, not care that much with others. I think I just gave to actively remind myself when there that fun is the point, not doing BoG, CRT, etc unless it’s fun. And remember to present it to the family as “today there’s this thing we can do. Anyone want to come?” If not they can chill at the hotel or maybe wander Disney Springs with my husband.

 

[RoseGold]

As to dining reservations - I would make a few (especially set up the BoG if going) - there is a $10 per person cancellation fee if you do not cancel within 2 hours (or maybe the day before - I think it changes).

This one I wouldn't be so concerned about. If you're not booking Space 220 or Cinderella or BOG, you can show up with less and make some excuse. Someone got sick on a ride or whatever. They aren't going to charge you for showing up with 2 instead of 4. Also, you can add the 5th to a 4 top for almost all as well. Exceptions would be the super popular restaurants, obviously. I would include Topolino in that list at the moment.

I actually did this for Hollywood and Vine, no issue, which is a great pick for your little one.

Heck, I even did this for Space 220 when we actually were really sick from the ride LOL.

 

[pineapplepalms]

You can definitely go for more days and enjoy a more relaxed pace. This what we typically do - we go to WDW for 2 weeks and take it easy. We don’t usually do rope drop or spend all day at the parks. We recently went to DLR for a week and spent 3 days with friends that were only there for those days, and we did way more on those 3 days of their trip than we usually do in a week because they wanted to experience as much as they could. They wondered how we could do a week at a time and I explained how our days are not usually as packed as when we were with them! After they left I spent the next morning at the GC spa while DH and the kids slept in and relaxed in the room. We have a 1 week WDW trip soon and we’ll be doing more on a given day than we usually do on a longer trip since we’re there for only half the usual number of days.

There are ways to relax and avoid large crowds on a Disney vacation if you seek them out. Watching the MK fireworks from the Poly beach is a nice option, or booking Treats & Seats which gives you a seat and no crowds (desserts are just okay and view of projections is not great, but we still really like it for the crowd-free experience). The Rose & Crown dining package was also a great, crowd-free experience if they are still offering it next year, but that one was very hard to book and you’d likely need to book it towards the end of the trip to get it. If you go to DS, weekdays earlier in the day are a lot less crowded, and even Gideon’s had a short wait compared to weekends/evenings.

 

[Mackenzie Click-Mickelson]

I’m sure I will be a truly terrible pilot but I don’t care, lol. I was actually thinking of a morning Oga’s reservation. Maybe a little less rowdy then but get to check it out? We can all enjoy a few mock tails although I doubt we’d stay long.

That sounds like a good plan IMO.

he was very open about how he wants to do things (no rope drop, shorter days in the parks with off days too, hence the choice of longer stay). He’d rather break Epcot into two very not rushed days where you stay 4 hours each than one long day,

So so important that he let you know that. One of my main advice when people talk about going with those who are not so impressed with the parks as a whole is get to know what they want and don't want.

Epcot split up is a great plan, I would have in the past suggested Future World then World Showcase because it made a bit more sense then. Future World doesn't really exist anymore and there's a lot of construction in the front part of Epcot but what could be good to split up with World Showcase is do one half then the other. With all that walking and the people just deciding to hit a few countries and the rest on a different day could be a good thing.

Perhaps we have a reservation for dinner here (fairly firm but I’ll eat the cancellation fee if I have to) or after hours tickets but maybe say I stacked the genie rides if you guys want to come. If not, have fun taking in the ambience and shopping or snacks while son and I hit the rides.

This sounds nice. In truth there are times where I've been and wished we took a moment to breath. On our last trip we did take the skyliner from Epcot to Riviera and had coffee sitting in the lobby and just taking a moment then rode the skyliner back to Epcot. I probably would not recommend the skyliner with your husband because of the height and enclosed space and saying honestly the risk of the skyliner stopping for an extended period of time but more giving that as an example of you can just take in the ambience at times but outside the parks too.

 

[JodyK]

I like you am a huge planner on my Disney vacations and it is really hard when you have people who have a variety of needs, ideas, and you never know what you will encounter on a Disney Vacation. I like to tell myself it takes a lot of planning to be flexible! You can also make a bunch of plans that just go by the wayside because you have to throw them out and start again which is stressful. I want my family to have a good time though so I like to have plans and then contingency plans.

Here's some things I do that could maybe be helpful in your situation:

Parks - My strategy would be to book MK and HS for a lot of my park days. Since these tend to sell out the most, it gives you the flexibility to switch to Epcot of AK last minute when you are there since they usually have reservations. I also think if you are doing Genie+ and do go with park hoppers stacking LLs for later in the day while you are on your break will help you encounter fewer lines in the afternoon.

Dining - With dining reservations as long as one person shows up you don't have to pay the cancellation fee so that allows for flexibility, they have also recently updated to the 2 hour cancellation which allows even more flexibility. I tend to book more reservations than I need and then cancel them when I have to. If I know everyone wants to eat at O'Hana I'll try to book it on multiple days and then cancel as it gets closer when we know what people want to do. If all else fails you can also do walkup lists, to go dining, or even last-minute reservations in the app. This is a harder pill to swallow with meals that are prepaid like CRT but if you can do it.

Activities - Things like BBB also is the 24 hour cancellation, book it on multiple days if you can and see which day works best when you get there.

General - Thinking about what the best situation are for your husband to do the things he is excited about. Ex - He wants to see your daughter meet princesses, what will the most successful version of that be? Maybe it is using the LL in MK for the princess meet and greet or dining at CRT instead of waiting in the middle of the day in the sun at EPCOT.

I would also chunk things together things that would be realistic for my husband to do in a 4-hour period together and then have other chunks of 4 hours with things he may not want to do. Then plug and play those together as you go along. You have a lot of time there with the 10 days so you do have a lot of flexibility to be like oh we were going to do this morning things at Epcot but we'd rather do the pool so we'll do those later in the trip.

Also keep in mind people cancel stuff last minute at Disney. So checking for things the night before or even the day of are still an option for you. Particularly if your family is flexible about what they want to do and doesn't have their heart set on too many particular things.

I hope you have an amazing trip for your family!

 

[🍀TwinsMom]

Okay, so I have a lot of thoughts and ideas! LOL. Would you consider renting DVC points at Wilderness Lodge Copper Creek or Boulder Ridge? Both are woodsy and quiet in February, and you'd have a kitchen and laundry in the room to get groceries delivered to have a leisurely breakfast in your room and coffee on the balcony overlooking the pool/lake? Or Riviera? It's a totally different vibe, but it's so convenient for Epcot/HS with the Skyliner. I'd feel good about the 14 and 12 year-old taking off to the park or leaving after us that way. WL/CC/BR and RR are quieter resorts and calm me down after a day in the park. Topolinos on site for character breakfast and adult dinner is an awesome perk, too. Plus, depending on the room you get, he can see the fireworks from your room for Epcot and avoid the crowds there, too.

Boardwalk would be awesome, too, for midday breaks. Their pool doesn't seem to get crazed like Stormalong Bay does with shrieking kids and crowds, and the location can't be beat.

I hear him on liking SOG, but renting DVC with a two-bedroom gets you TONS of space to decompress and spread out your crap and get groceries and booze delivered. You save money on hard reservations, and he gets a private, quiet space to relax.

Bonus, if you stay deluxe (and I guess SOG?) you get the Extra Late Hours, or whatever they call it. Epcot is Mondays and MK is Wednesdays. We totally have given up on going to the parks during daytime unless it's just for wandering World Showcase or a restaurant we're trying to hit. Keep everyone up late and go those nights. They are NOT to be missed!

On FB, there's a group, Ear for Each Other, and it's all the furloughed cast members with side hustles. You can save HUNDREDS having a cast member come to your room and do the whole BBB thing for your daughter, away from the craziness at MK, and she can still go to the park all dolled up afterwards. Dad can see her getting all dolled up from your deluxe room, NOT rushing to make an appointment. There's also a Ohana chef that will come TO YOUR ROOM and cook the whole meal for you. You can get private drivers for airport transfers, deluxe charcuterie boards, grocery shoppers, etc.

I think the VIP is a great idea, honestly. Bang everything out in one organized day, let the tour guide be the bad guy for flogging everyone hitting all the headliners, LOL, and then putter at your own pace the rest of the week.

IDK if your husband likes fishing, but I paid for my husband and son to do fishing at Yacht Club (catch and release,) and they really liked it! Just an idea for him.

I think renting DVC 2-bedroom would be wonderful for you guys. We all need a break from one another on the trips, and last time our son just wanted to chill out at the room almost all the time. We were okay with it, and it was a lot less stressful.

Lastly, even if he doesn't NEED it, would you consider renting a scooter for him? My husband uses it (knee replacement/bad ankles/joints,) and while it saves his feet, he loves having his own personal perimeter riding inside of it (with sun canopy,) LOL. I think it's just a subconscious thing, but he's a lot more relaxed with using it. It's about $300 a week, and it does come in handy to hold all of our crap in the parks in the basket!