Loving the Journey - Feb 2020 W.I.S.H. Challenge

My DD had the same group of friends all through elementary and into middle school. All of the parents were friends too, and we socialized with and without the girls. We all volunteered at school together, did Brownies, summer programs, parties, Halloween, etc... A few of these mothers were my very close friends.

Then one day, one of the girls' (Erika) attitude began to change. She was acting jealous of the closeness between DD and her friend, Moira. Erin started excluding DD and another friend from normal group activities. DD was invited to someone's house when nobody was actually home. Erika & Moira's mothers started acting weird with me too. The night of the 8th grade dance, we were the last to arrive at Moira's house for photos. Everyone else had been invited one hour earlier. Erika and her mother had been there all day getting her makeup done. Moira's mother made a fuss over Erika lending her expensive jewelry. DD went from being Moira's bestie to being last to know about everything. One morning before school when all of the friends were in their circle talking, Erika pushed DD out of the circle onto the ground. In PE, she threw a baseball at DD hitting her in the arm. Her arm blew up, and I had to leave work to take her to the pediatrician. When the doctor heard the story, she documented it in case we needed it to pursue a bullying complaint. The school was not helpful. They basically said that we could file a complaint, but it would hurt DD in the long run, because these girls would probably go after her in subtle ways well into high school...better for DD to drop it and make new friends.

DD and the other girl being ostracized left the friendship group and each made new friends. They drifted apart as well. DD's best friend freshman year of high school helped her cope with the bullying. That child died at the end of freshman year. We were all devastated. DD went through an "Emo" faze and was very depressed. Thank God she was attending a half-day performing arts high school where she found wonderful friends who loved and accepted her. Now as a 22 year old adult, these are still her most cherished friends.

Kids can be so cruel, and it is excruciating watching your child be treated badly. It is a harsh lesson to learn that people can be so heartless. Remind your child of her worth and how much she means to you and how much she is loved. She will find her tribe one day. She will have friends that absolutely love her. In the meantime, protect her like the Mama Bear I am sure that you are.

Why do girls have to be so mean. I am so glad your DD found her group of friends. My DD will too after the storm is over. The one girl Savannah that seems to be the cause of this I have been been warned about. She has tons of issues and comes form a really bad back ground. The teachers have warned me to do my best to keep them apart. I knew this day was coming. DD's anxiety issues are not making this any better. The one friend that spent the night at our house on Saturday (Miranda) is a super sweet girl who is very quite. I am guessing she is following what Savannah is telling her because she is afraid of her.

I will keep an eye on if things escalate further into bulling. Not sure we are there yet. Her teachers have been great and sent me updates on DD throughout the day. They have spent extra time with her talking to her about how great she is and helping her get through this. Her English teacher gave her a smooth rock that says fearless on it today to hold and rub throughout the day to help distract her mind. Tonight we are going to make her disconnect from her phone. She only has a phone calling app that she can do group video chats in. They have all blocked her on the app. Thankfully I refuse to let her get snap chat and Instagram. But we are planning on playing board games as a family tonight.

Thank you for telling me your story. It has really helped.
 
Why do girls have to be so mean. I am so glad your DD found her group of friends. My DD will too after the storm is over. The one girl Savannah that seems to be the cause of this I have been been warned about. She has tons of issues and comes form a really bad back ground. The teachers have warned me to do my best to keep them apart. I knew this day was coming. DD's anxiety issues are not making this any better. The one friend that spent the night at our house on Saturday (Miranda) is a super sweet girl who is very quite. I am guessing she is following what Savannah is telling her because she is afraid of her.

I will keep an eye on if things escalate further into bulling. Not sure we are there yet. Her teachers have been great and sent me updates on DD throughout the day. They have spent extra time with her talking to her about how great she is and helping her get through this. Her English teacher gave her a smooth rock that says fearless on it today to hold and rub throughout the day to help distract her mind. Tonight we are going to make her disconnect from her phone. She only has a phone calling app that she can do group video chats in. They have all blocked her on the app. Thankfully I refuse to let her get snap chat and Instagram. But we are planning on playing board games as a family tonight.

Thank you for telling me your story. It has really helped.
It’s been 9 years, and I swear it feels like it happened yesterday. The memories are so clear. I just wanted you to know that you and your daughter aren’t alone in this, and it does get better. I’m glad that she has supportive teachers and a great mother looking out for her.
 
My woohoos for Wednesday the 5th are I have lost the 5 pounds of the over 5 pounds I gained between Jan 30 and Feb 1 and it is getting so much easier to walk and get up from my chair. We heard from the genetic testing place in our state and they surprisingly have heard back from our insurance that it is not something that needs preauthorization so the plan is to have them send a fax of, the orders to 12 year old's primary but we will be mailed a hard copy. I got the report from the visit in the mail today when 14 year old walked out to get the mail at the road tonight. There are a few discripancies on the family history and ancessory sections so I am needing to call the genetic counselor again tomorrow to see if we can get those corrected. One of them it looks like DH had a brother who is now deceased with a health issue when it actually was his uncle so 12 year old's great uncle and some of my ancessery is of an ethnic group living in another country then where the main group lived due to immigration to that country where unlike in the US there was not the intermingling of the immigrant group and the original group in the country with generations later a 2nd wave of immigration to the United States and some to other parts of North and South America. I got some speed dial numbers assigned on my new phone and know how to add them now and I got ring tones assigned with one tone being DH or the break room at his work number because he will call me on that phone if he had forgotten to charge his and it's dead, one being 15 year old's number, 1 being for my siblings, parents, 15 year old's best friend's aunt (mom is working at 2 different locations for her job and is putting in 70 plus hour weeks so the aunt is the more reachable adult when the girls are together doing something or trying to arrange something especially since neither of them drive and there is not public transportation to get to places though we are a bit closer with it only being 3-5 miles to get on a public bus from our house depending on the time of day and day of the week where best friend is 10 plus miles and for both of them getting to the bus involves walking along a US Highway that are very busy and no sidewalks or walking paths so not happening, and inlaws numbers. When I am driving I use the bluetooth mainly (unless I forgot to charge it or it decides it is too darn cold and refuses to connect) but I don't want to be using the phone when not necessary even with a hand held device so I plan to only answer calls from DH and 15 year old, the group with my parents and inlaws will be answered immediately in situations where I know there is something going on and they might need to get a hold of me such as if DH's parents are watching 12 year old for us or 15 year old is with her best friend and aunt is trying to connect with us to finalize where we are meeting up after an activity the girls have gone to otherwise those ones fall under the I will check for a message or call you back when I can pull off somewhere such as I have gotten to the store and will check really quick either before I go in or when I get back to my car before I pull out of the parking space and start driving, everyone else is currently on a I will check messages when I get home and get a chance though there are some that if I happen to see they called and I have a moment and the time of the notification that there is a new voice mail is the same as the miss call I will listen to it and return the call as soon as I can. These are mainly those from 4-H both the extension office and a few parents I am in closer contact with.
Right now I am wishing that 12 year old would go to bed though she is being quiet listening to some songs including never smile at a crocodile though if the raining tacos song starts playing I am going to be changing my residence to a nice home because that song is just about as annoying as the baby shark song.
 
It's Thankful Thursday!!

Let's play acrostics this morning. Pick any related word (thanks, thankful, gratitude, blessed...whatever works for you) and make it up out of things your are thankful for. I'll start:

Time spent with children - It keeps me young.
Home - Especially after a long day.
Art - I find being creative very restorative.
Nice people - Including the ones here on the DIS!
Kitty-cats!! - I have two.
Sunny days :sunny::sunny::sunny:
 


G - great variety of classes I can try in the location we moved in!
R - rice - whole grain rice must be my favourite carb - filling, versatile and cheap
A -Adaptability we don't have to do the same thing if it stops working, we can adapt healthy plans to suit us and our current environment & situation and preference
T - time spend with family and friends, or time spend making new friends
I - intuition
T - time spend doing things that I love doing - walks, cooking, movies, yoga
U - turns - the ability to change direction :)
D - diversity, I love living and working with so many people with different background, nationality and personality
E - energy. I have felt so unwell for awhile, great to feel bit of energy this morning
 
T -- Teachers -- Getting updates of them helping DD in a rough patch and getting updated like today that she is have an awesome day so far
H -- Husband -- He is always there for me when things gets rough and tells me it will all be ok.
A -- Animals -- My kids love them. Not me as much. They both want to go in a career with them. DS wants to be a zoologist and DD a vet
N -- Neighbors -- It is always nice to have neighbors that you get along with
K -- Kid -- I didn't have a D or E for DD and needed to add her too. She is a mini me that feels everything to the fullest except for my love of Disney.
S -- Son -- the one that keeps me on my toes. He teaches us new stuff everyday and is way smarter then me.

Ok this was hard but I got through it.
 
It’s been 9 years, and I swear it feels like it happened yesterday. The memories are so clear. I just wanted you to know that you and your daughter aren’t alone in this, and it does get better. I’m glad that she has supportive teachers and a great mother looking out for her.

Thank you! She was happy when I got home last night and this morning. We went to the store to get a Worry Rock but got a book instead since they didn't have the rocks. We ordered the rock for her though. It was nice having just mom and DD time. I have already heard from a teacher saying she is having an awesome day.

She did tell me that she started to talk to other kids yesterday and one that she didn't like because of the death stare she gave all the time. That girl asked DD if she was ok and then they started talking. Feeling better today
 


G - Grandparents (for all they do, especially watching their grandchildren...my kids...while my husband and I go to Vero Beach next week)
R - Reading - I’m enjoying my new kindle unlimited that I got for Christmas
A - Athletics - I absolutely love watching my kids play sports
T - Teaching - my job
I - Income - so fortunate for a consistent income
T - Twins - my kids are my world!
U - Union - for supporting my husband during his work injury
D - Disney World - my happy place
E - Exercise - I really truly enjoy my alone time each morning as I complete my workouts
 
I’m a little behind this week. I’ll try to catch up...

For Woohoo Wednesday
Woohoo - the number in the scale is slowly going down. I’ll do other measurements again on Sunday.
Woohoo - in a week I’ll be at Disney’s Vero Beach. Temps look to be in the 80s!

From Topic Tuesday
“I believe it's important to look at healthy habits not as depriving ourselves of what we want, but as giving ourselves what we need to feel good.”
I love this and I completely agree with this! We need to give ourselves healthy habits so our bodies get what they need. But its not always easy to resist the stuff we don’t need...but we really want. But I work hard to maintain as many healthy habits as I can...daily workouts, healthy daily breakfast and lunches, getting enough sleep most days. Then it’s not a big deal when I do give into temptation (the work room donuts or the birthday cake or the super bowl snacks or the Chef Mickey’s buffet) because it’s not the norm. Most days I try to give my body what it needs...the exercise, the food, the sleep. But it’s ok for the occasional treat.
 
T... time, having the time to do the things that bring us joy, time to learn and to grow.
H... hoods, it is stinking wet outside again today and I am grateful to have a cozy hood on my jacket to pull on to keep warm/dry.
A... Alaska Airlines. It's who we fly on for work and I usually take to WDW and over all they do a very good job.
N... needles, as in knitting needles and sewing needles, both tools to create with.
K... have to also go with Kitties! The old man is still doing great with the new regime.
S... sleep, restful, blissful sleep.

A fun exercise!
 
G grandson-great joy of my life!
R relatives-love my family
A. active-so grateful I can move around!
T teachers-I had good ones, worked with amazing ones
E education-thankful to live in a country and era where education was made possible for women
F friends that bring so much joy to my life
U unions-I am thankful for their part in making my job so rewarding for so many years and protecting my pension so I have a secure retirement
L the love of my life, my dear husband of 40 years

Loved reading everyone’s posts! Thank you for sharing!
 
I woke up this morning with one thing in my mind. well two. WDW and Universal Orlando.

:(

Either would be a great place to be right now! Our weather here is kind of dreary, and a little Florida sunshine would be nice.

On my mind is my DS, who is not feeling well (again :() while away at college. He's not as sick as last time, just a bug, but the poor kid deserves a break!
 
On my mind is the weather and the kids school. We are finally getting winter weather here. Some areas can get up to 6 inches of snow. I took the train in today to avoid the crummy roads.

The kids school because there are so many kids out sick. I have heard that yesterday they had 250 kids out. It is a big school with roughly 2000 students in grades 5,6,7 and 8th. We are close to the point of closing the school due to illness. Last night about 20 school in the area had already closed today due to illness and one for no heat. I am really hoping my kids don't get it.
 
On my mind today...

... have to give a presentation in front of a large group today. It's a quarterly thing and this is the third time, but I have to admit I kind of don't care all that much. So it'll either go really well, because I'm relaxed, or it'll be a mess.

... on site testing did not go well this week, with continual issues with the robots. There's a very slim chance that I'll travel next week, but I really, really, really don't want to, we'll know later today.

... mid-week a gal I follow on IG posted that she's teaching at a knitting retreat in Port Townsend the first weekend in March. I called the shop putting together the retreat and was able to get in to one of her classes. And I got a room at the hotel we stayed at right after Christmas, which I quite like, so that's a nice little something to look forward to.

... I have my second EFT session tomorrow, also a nice little something to look forward to.
 

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