Tipping Advice from former waitgirl!

[Crispy21]

What is a tip?

Main Entry: 10tip
Function: noun
Date: 1755
: a gift or a sum of money tendered for a service performed or anticipated :

 

[apostolic4life]

The poster is from Holland. Can you speak and write in Dutch?

I completely understand that sjaakie is from a country other than the USA. Notice the laughing smilely faces........that meant I was being funny......you need to lighten up!!!! If I offended you sjaakie please forgive me.

I see you edited out the "mean spirited" part or your nasty comment. Thanks!!!

 

[TLSnell1981]

I completely understand that sjaakie is from a country other than the USA. Notice the laughing smilely faces........that meant I was being funny......you need to lighten up!!!! If I offended you sjaakie please forgive me.

I see you edited out the "mean spirited" part or your nasty comment. Thanks!!!

I did edit my post. I realize you are a resonable poster and decided to give you the benefit of the doubt.

 

[sjaakie]

The poster is from Holland. Can you speak and write in Dutch?

O God I'm trying to write in English so please forgive me if I make a silly mistake.

And no I'm not offended by all means

 

[TLSnell1981]

O God I'm trying to write in English so please forgive me if I make a silly mistake.

And no I'm not offended by all means

You write English very well. Most of us in this country don't know our own language....much less a second or third.

 

[apostolic4life]

I did edit my post. I realize you are a resonable poster and decided to give you the benefit of the doubt.

Thank you........I truly did not intend any form of disrespect; I love my DIS friends!!!!

 

[Pixeldust Fairy]

Its tacky not to tip (except under rare circumstances) in the U.S. Its tacky to tell other people what to tip unless someone asks you.

I agree. It is tacky! I think the whole tipping thing is getting out of hand. Everyone has their hand out anymore for a tip.

 

[Pixeldust Fairy]

I just found this on the web. Interesting http://www.877tippool.com/877facts.html

So what Im understanding by the first item on this, is that employers of waitstaff are only required to pay minimum wage as is everyone. But restaraunt employers have a "tip credit" allotted to them so that they only have to pay a rate of 2 or so bucks an hour. And WE as customers are EXPECTED to bring the servers pay to above minimum wage. Hmmm too bad that doesnt work for my employees. I could EXPECT my customers to bring my employees pay to above minimum wage. That would save me alot of money on taxes and wages.

 

[DiszyDean]

I believe the poster is referring to the union at Disney. There have been statements as to "sneeze sandwiches" on this thread. It is not unheard of for waitstaff to "add a little something extra" to an undesirable guest's food .It's ashame our society's sense of entitlement has gotten so out of hand.....in the restaurant industry. Sorry, tipping may be customary and expected, but it is still NOT required. It is still...in most places...left to the discretion of the patron. It is a service charge when it is automatically added....NOT a gratuity.

Sorry, but tipping is a STANDARD in this country anyway for standard/good service at resteraunts where you are served. For poor service, all bets are off. But saying that tipping is "optional" for good service is being obtuse. Tipping is not akin to throwing some change in the bucket at your local Salvation Army stop.

It is ignorant to try to lump all servers into the same category. Just as with any other group of people. I agree that there is a sense of entitlement in this country but not always on the side of the server. It is a shame that people will generalize, look down upon, degrade people who work in the service industry. They don't mind them waiting on them hand and foot or cleaning up their messes but to actually support the tipping system that has been in place since before most of us were born, is just too much to ask of us? It is "optional" after all.

And if their was no tipping system, you would still be paying the servers wages but at that point, the level at which you paid would no longer be discretionary or based on level of service. You would pay for it in the cost of the food you purchased.

It is a sorry state of affairs when people lose all courtesy and common sense to try to justify their own cheapness.

Not directed at anyone inparticular but you know who you are.

 

[DiszyDean]

I just found this on the web. Interesting http://www.877tippool.com/877facts.html

So what Im understanding by the first item on this, is that employers of waitstaff are only required to pay minimum wage as is everyone. But restaraunt employers have a "tip credit" allotted to them so that they only have to pay a rate of 2 or so bucks an hour. And WE as customers are EXPECTED to bring the servers pay to above minimum wage. Hmmm too bad that doesnt work for my employees. I could EXPECT my customers to bring my employees pay to above minimum wage. That would save me alot of money on taxes and wages.

Your customers do cover your employee's wages but more indirectly and with less discrection on what they get paid. And I am assuming you do pay your employees minimum wage.

Some of you act like the whole concept of tipping is foreign to you.

 

[Tricia1972]

Has anyone said that they don't tip at all? I haven't read that, but maybe I missed a post or two.

I don't think that the PP who said that tipping is optional or a gift is trying to imply that they do not tip, but rather I believe that they are saying that as it's an optional gift the percentage to tip is up to the consumer. If they tip 10% or 30% it's up to the individual to decide that for themselves what to tip.

Is 10% the standard anymore? No, and I am not saying that. However 30% tips are not standard either. Tipping above and below the standard should eventually even out for the server.

Though I don't generally support the notion of tipping 10% when you receive amazing service, in the case of the couple celebrating their 60th anniversary I think the 10% tip was appropriate. There are always extenuating circumstances in life that we may or may not know about. (Actually after the waitress confronted them I feel that 5% was more appropriate - that was pretty rude)

 

[Pixeldust Fairy]

Your customers do cover your employee's wages but more indirectly and with less discrection on what they get paid. And I am assuming you do pay your employees minimum wage.

Some of you act like the whole concept of tipping is foreign to you.

Even though, my customers "indirectly" cover my employee's wages, its not exactly true. Restaraunt employers are NOT taxed on the same amount of wages I get taxed on. I am taxed on the full minimum wage, they are only taxed on the 2 or so bucks.
I actually pay my employees more than minimum wage even starting out, and I am always a good tipper. I just find this whole thread a little un - nerving because of the whole attitude with servers. As I said before I come from a long line of servers. And I loved being a waitress. But never once did I not appreciate the tip I received, whether it be 10-20% or less. I was appreciative of every patron that came into the establishment I worked and whether they had children or not. I looked at every customer with the same eyes. Its funny how things have changed in such a short time.

 

[DiszyDean]

Has anyone said that they don't tip at all? I haven't read that, but maybe I missed a post or two.

I don't think that the PP who said that tipping is optional or a gift is trying to imply that they do not tip, but rather I believe that they are saying that as it's an optional gift the percentage to tip is up to the consumer. If they tip 10% or 30% it's up to the individual to decide that for themselves what to tip.

Is 10% the standard anymore? No, and I am not saying that. However 30% tips are not standard either. Tipping above and below the standard should eventually even out for the server.

Though I don't generally support the notion of tipping 10% when you receive amazing service, in the case of the couple celebrating their 60th anniversary I think the 10% tip was appropriate. There are always extenuating circumstances in life that we may or may not know about. (Actually after the waitress confronted them I feel that 5% was more appropriate - that was pretty rude)

If a tip is warranted for good service, the tip in that case is not "optional" in my eyes and in the eyes of society in general. I do not think they meant discretionary as to the value of the tip, I think the meant what they said...optional..meaning they do or they don't. And if they do, then its just a "gift" aka charity.

30% is not the standard, no doubt. No one ever claimed it was. The OP of this thread did not claim that 30% was the standard. People have read way too much into what the original post said and it has seemed to "evolve" in this thread.

The server in that case, if she solicited tips, directly or indirectly from the couple should be reprimanded IMO. That being said, whether old or young or whatever, if you want to eat in a fancy resteraunt, make sure you can afford it INCLUDING the standard, customary tip if warranted by the service you provided. And as you mentioned, that is not 10%. What if they had not brought enough money to pay the actual food bill? Should that be excused too?

I am sure a lot of people would like to eat out at fancy resteraunts, buy new cars every year, take fancy vacations and I am sure most of these people have great stories and are very nice people that we would all sympathize with. But the reality of the world is that if you do not have the money to do something that extravegant, dont do it. Not having the funds is not a very good excuse for not tipping in today's world.

 

[DiszyDean]

Even though, my customers "indirectly" cover my employee's wages, its not exactly true. Restaraunt employers are NOT taxed on the same amount of wages I get taxed on. I am taxed on the full minimum wage, they are only taxed on the 2 or so bucks.
I actually pay my employees more than minimum wage even starting out, and I am always a good tipper. I just find this whole thread a little un - nerving because of the whole attitude with servers. As I said before I come from a long line of servers. And I loved being a waitress. But never once did I not appreciate the tip I received, whether it be 10-20% or less. I was appreciative of every patron that came into the establishment I worked and whether they had children or not. I looked at every customer with the same eyes. Its funny how things have changed in such a short time.

Not much more to say here that I haven't already said. So, for those keeping score:

1. All servers are self-entitled.
2. They are are making tons of money off the the real hard working people of the world.
3. They don't appreciate tips.
4. They all spit in our food.
5. They really don't work that hard.
6. Most servers are rude.
7. All servers are greedy.

These are some of the things said whether implied or directly in this thread alone. Maybe a slight exhageration but not too far from the truth.

 

[mom2my3kids]

This is my biggest gripe too........I tell servers to keep the change if that is my intention, but if you see me paying a $51 check with a fifty and a twenty, then assume you get to keep the change, you have insured yourself of a lower tip. Many people just say "No, I don't need the change" just to avoid an awkward moment, and servers are betting on that......this is a form of extortion in my opinion. Ok, I feel better with that off my chest!

Most guest will just assume you realize that they don't want change, you go take time and change them bring it back and they say "oh no keep the change". I try not to ask if you need change, I will just look you in the eye with a smile and say " I will be right back with your change, most of the time the customer will catch on and say ohhh no keep the change. Lets say if a customers bill is 18.28 but they leave a twenty and three ones and does not say keep the change. I will come back and say did you need change on that, because obviously they wanted you to keep the change but didn't say it. In saying all this lmao most of the time the server is just trying to save a step and ask, but I agree I almost never do this.

 

[angelmav]

Hello All! Not trying to be rude or pushy but I used to be a wait staffer and manager, as well as a bartender.

Now days, 18 to 20% is the norm for regular service. I know that when I take my children, who I make be as neat as possible, I start at 30% and go down, depending on service and messiness of my children.

I do understand that many people are on a budget, but can you imagine how many non-tippers and parents with messy children are at DW places on a regular basis? Remember, many of these people work there for jobs, not for fun! (Hard to believe not everyone loves DW, huh?) Also, they have to split tips with the bartender and the clean-up crew, and many times the hostess that seats you. And they take the brunt of frustration about bad food, or just bad day in general.

As a former waitstaff, please be generous to them as much as you can. It is a lot easier to get great service when you tip well, and are considerate to the server. I always say thank you and please, and try my best to keep neat because the work is hard and you would be super suprised the quality of the service you can get most of the time.

Just some advice from someone who knows!!!

DiszyDean, no one is talking about 'stiffing' a server but you so you need to back off in that regard. A tip is still optional just like saying please and thank you are optional. Its expected that youll tip just like its expected that youll treat others with kindness and respect, but your under no lawful directive to do either, just a moral directive to which after 20 pages no one is disagreeing about. Heck, after 20 pages of this I cant find a single poster that agree's with the OP 'Advice'

The OP posted this as an expert and that we should consider following her lead. She has stated the reasons that she thinks its a good idea to do as she does and makes a case for it.

Dont ignore the original intent of the post.

 

[Tricia1972]

30% is not the standard, no doubt. No one ever claimed it was. The OP of this thread did not claim that 30% was the standard. People have read way too much into what the original post said and it has seemed to "evolve" in this thread.

I also said 10% is not standard (average). I simply was saying that between low tips and high tips - it averages in the end.

The server in that case, if she solicited tips, directly or indirectly from the couple should be reprimanded IMO.

I agree

That being said, whether old or young or whatever, if you want to eat in a fancy resteraunt, make sure you can afford it INCLUDING the standard, customary tip if warranted by the service you provided. And as you mentioned, that is not 10%. What if they had not brought enough money to pay the actual food bill? Should that be excused too?

Some people, perhaps not the couple from this story, feel that where society dictates that the standard is 15% it should be 10%. Thus 10% is the standard for them. Just like it's up to a person to tip 30% if they choose, why can't couple to start tipping at 10% if they choose.

I am sure a lot of people would like to eat out at fancy resteraunts, buy new cars every year, take fancy vacations and I am sure most of these people have great stories and are very nice people that we would all sympathize with. But the reality of the world is that if you do not have the money to do something that extravegant, dont do it. Not having the funds is not a very good excuse for not tipping in today's world.

They were not dining at a fancy restaurant, and the 10% tip was due to an error he made before leaving for dinner. Here's the original post for your reference

I forgot to mention something I witnessed that made my hair stand on end! I overheard a waitress ask this much older couple what was wrong with her service as they only tipped her 10% of the check and asked was there something wrong with her service.

Well, the gentleman said yes dear there was something wrong. He has bad vision and counted his money before they went out and counted wrong. He aplogized and said he was very sorry. As she walked away grunting the wife learned over and said I told you this was a bad idea I don't know why I let you take me here. He said he was sorry but felt she did deserve a nice night out being that it was their 60th anniversary. He then was telling her how much he loved her and at that point I stopped listening. I wanted to cry. This was not a fancy place sadly I was certain he had squeezed that out of their SS check. You never know.

I know that you and I are reading the original post differently. However I still maintain that when an 'expert' offers advice, sharing what they do is part of their advice. As I stated previously a thread started by a lawyer "Legal Advice from a Lawyer" and then tells what they do in situations, what they do is easily construed as part of the advice. What kind of idiot would not listen to a lawyer and what they do? They're in the business and know the right way to handle things.

Here's the OP where I have highlighted what I am referring to. To me she's saying that anything beyond regular should be more than 18%-20% and 30% is the figure that she certainly seems to be suggesting (especially for those with children)

Hello All! Not trying to be rude or pushy but I used to be a wait staffer and manager, as well as a bartender.

Now days, 18 to 20% is the norm for regular service. I know that when I take my children, who I make be as neat as possible, I start at 30% and go down, depending on service and messiness of my children.

I do understand that many people are on a budget, but can you imagine how many non-tippers and parents with messy children are at DW places on a regular basis? Remember, many of these people work there for jobs, not for fun! (Hard to believe not everyone loves DW, huh?) Also, they have to split tips with the bartender and the clean-up crew, and many times the hostess that seats you. And they take the brunt of frustration about bad food, or just bad day in general.

As a former waitstaff, please be generous to them as much as you can. It is a lot easier to get great service when you tip well, and are considerate to the server. I always say thank you and please, and try my best to keep neat because the work is hard and you would be super suprised the quality of the service you can get most of the time.

Just some advice from someone who knows!!!

 

[angelmav]

Not much more to say here that I haven't already said. So, for those keeping score:

1. All servers are self-entitled.
2. They are are making tons of money off the the real hard working people of the world.
3. They don't appreciate tips.
4. They all spit in our food.
5. They really don't work that hard.
6. Most servers are rude.
7. All servers are greedy.

These are some of the things said whether implied or directly in this thread alone. Maybe a slight exhageration but not too far from the truth.

Calling what you just said a 'slight exaggeration' would be a pretty 'Major Exaggeration'

 

[Crispy21]

Does a server working at a place where each table has an average bill of $200.00 work harder then a server working at a place where the average bill is $100.00 per table?

20% of $200=$40

20% of $100=$20

Each table would equal aprox 1/3 of an hour of work,assuming they were waiting on 3 tables at any one time.

 

[my3disneygirls]

Sorry, but tipping is a STANDARD in this country anyway for standard/good service at resteraunts where you are served. For poor service, all bets are off. But saying that tipping is "optional" for good service is being obtuse. Tipping is not akin to throwing some change in the bucket at your local Salvation Army stop.

And if their was no tipping system, you would still be paying the servers wages but at that point, the level at which you paid would no longer be discretionary or based on level of service. You would pay for it in the cost of the food you purchased.

It is a sorry state of affairs when people lose all courtesy and common sense to try to justify their own cheapness.

Not directed at anyone inparticular but you know who you are.

Exactly, the system is that customers tip their servers. How this whole system worked out I don't know, but as long as I can remember it's been at least 15% . I ate out all the time in all kinds of places when I was growing up, so I was aware of restaurant protocol. Once I went out with a friend and her father and he only left two dollars. She served three people a complete meal and he threw 2 bucks on the table. I was only about 12, but I was mortified.

I don't know how anyone can think that tipping is optional. I go into a restaurant fully intending to tip 20%, if the service is not good than it goes down from there.