Do you ever take your Nanny or Babysitter with you?

[MJS]

 

[Maistre Gracey]

Please- No offense to the OP, I'm only giving my opinion...

My wife and I have been trying to have kids for several years now, with no luck.
If we are fortunate enough to have kids at somepoint in the future, I just couldn't imagine them being an interruption to our WDW vacation.

I guess we all have our own thoughts and opinions on this.
Actually, when I read this post yesterday I figured the OP would be skewered and well done by this point.

MG

 

[Maistre Gracey]

How is it different from the people that bring grandma along just to watch the kids?

Grandma is family.

MG

 

[3DisneyKids]

Sending you best wishes, MG. I know how stressful that can be.

 

[MJS]

MG, we have been there, too. Good luck!

 

[bavaria]

It's a different world these days, that's for sure.

Actually, it has nothing to do with the times, but rather cultural differences. Nannies have been around for a very long time; some families are choosing to continue the tradition.

I realize that the majority of the posters here are American, and may not have been exposed very often to other countries and cultures. Nannies are very common in other countries and even in certain parts of North America.

 

[Sammie]

I am not even so sure it has anything to do with cultural differences or the "times". I knew many people in my high school that as baby sitters they went on vacation with other families.

As to the family vacation comment, well to many the Nanny or sitter is family.

I just think that with the Net and forums such as this, we hear about it more.

 

[jdvm]

When our kids were younger (we have 4 daughters, 2 of which are twins) we had a live in nanny with set defined rules, responsibilities and times. We brought her with us to Old Key West a number of times. You have to redefine the rules, responsibilities and times but we found it incredibly helpful as did the kids and Emma. There's no right or wrong here. iI it works at home, it will work on the road.
John

 

[mufasa0505]

MG, good luck to you and your wife! I know how sad and stressful it can be.

 

[tacomaranch]

Our son has autism and we are old! That is just the fact of the matter. I can't catch him if he takes off at full run. I have programmed red light for him to stop but it doesn't always work.

We have respite thru the state program where the help is paid by the state. We made our first trip and second by ourselves with DS. It was just DH, DS and myself. We had a blast but I was tired, very very tired. We had dinner at Brown Derby and DH was so upset that DS would not settle down that I ended up taking DS outside while DH ate dinner. It was awful!

I have gone back to WDW and to DL with hired help. I have paid the airfare, and hotel while they pay for the tickets and gifts.

We sit down and have a very realistic discussion of what is expected of them, when they will be working, when they will have free time, costs, plans, etc.

I don't just say come along we will have fun, it takes planning and communications!!!!

For our upcoming trip we are staying in a 2 br. villa and bringing our respite helper from winter, her sister and a friend of theirs. It is so many strangers but they have their own room and we have ours. They have paid for all expenses except the room and for the room they will take DS when I say.

We will all eat together at the end of the day to share what fun we had and then all girls must be in the room by 1 am. They will have free time after dinner.

I can only say that it is your family and do what is right for you. We have done both and it is fun both ways but easy with help.

 

[crys5]

i wouldn't bring a babysitter/nanny or anyone else to Disney to help with the kids. I have 4 ,all girls, (24, 19, 14, and 3) we have gone to Disney when they were younger quite a few times. My husband and I may not have had time to go off by ourselves, but i figured there would be a time when they are older for that. It would have been nice, but when they are little you want to enjoy every minute with them that you can especially on vacation. Since the others are older now we have been going once a year since 2005, now if we want we can go off and do something together as a couple without the kids when the 3 year old is sleeping for the night. It may happen, may not but, if it doesn't we still will have a great time on our trips. But who you want to go to DISNEY with you is up to you....good luck

 

[Family5LovesDisney]

My sister needs to have a nanny because she has MS and is having twins. Her doctor recommended that she have professional help for at least the first eight months after the twins are born. Since her DH will be at business meetings a good part of the time they are at Disney next February, she will need to bring her nanny along to assist her when she is on her own.

 

[TravelingJen24]

When Wolgang posted "It's a different world these days, that's for sure." It made me feel like I was doing something wrong by asking this. I never stated that I was mad or angry, but rather inquiring into his opinion of my question. I'm sorry if I thought it was condensending, but it just came off that way to me. I appreciate everyone's opinions, and it is true that all families are different. I wanted to see if other posters had ever done this or considered it. It bothers me that it has to be loaded question.
I just have one more thing I almost forgot, another poster stated that a grandma is family and that is why it is different then a babysitter. Our babysitter is practically a part of the family and well into her twenties. My children adhore her and just because she is not blood doesn't mean that we don't consider her to be family. I hope that no one has been offend because I haven't even if it appeared that way. Next time I will clarify myself.

 

[Sammie]

When Wolgang posted "It's a different world these days, that's for sure." It made me feel like I was doing something wrong by asking this. I never stated that I was mad or angry, but rather inquiring into his opinion of my question. I'm sorry if I thought it was condensending, but it just came off that way to me. I appreciate everyone's opinions, and it is true that all families are different. I wanted to see if other posters had ever done this or considered it. It bothers me that it has to be loaded question.
I just have one more thing I almost forgot, another poster stated that a grandma is family and that is why it is different then a babysitter. Our babysitter is practically a part of the family and well into her twenties. My children adhore her and just because she is not blood doesn't mean that we don't consider her to be family. I hope that no one has been offend because I haven't even if it appeared that way. Next time I will clarify myself.

Believe me just because someone is family does not mean I want them on my trips. On the other hand a sitter or Nanny might very well be welcome.

Don't let it bother you if others do not want to take a sitter with them or that you do. Neither is wrong, just different. On this forum at times some forget it is OK to be different. And at times forget what the orginial question was, which was "Do you ever take your Nanny or Sitter with you", "Not" Would you Take a Nanny or Sitter with you on vacation? There is a difference.

Good luck with your decision.

 

[Maistre Gracey]

I just have one more thing I almost forgot, another poster stated that a grandma is family and that is why it is different then a babysitter. Our babysitter is practically a part of the family and well into her twenties. My children adhore her and just because she is not blood doesn't mean that we don't consider her to be family.

If you consider your babysitter family, than why is this even a question?
Why would you leave a family member behind?

MG

 

[bavaria]

When Wolgang posted "It's a different world these days, that's for sure." It made me feel like I was doing something wrong by asking this. I never stated that I was mad or angry, but rather inquiring into his opinion of my question. I'm sorry if I thought it was condensending, but it just came off that way to me. I appreciate everyone's opinions, and it is true that all families are different. I wanted to see if other posters had ever done this or considered it. It bothers me that it has to be loaded question.
I just have one more thing I almost forgot, another poster stated that a grandma is family and that is why it is different then a babysitter. Our babysitter is practically a part of the family and well into her twenties. My children adhore her and just because she is not blood doesn't mean that we don't consider her to be family. I hope that no one has been offend because I haven't even if it appeared that way. Next time I will clarify myself.

Jen, I'll bet that you didn't realize that you would open yourself up to nominations to the Disboards Parenting Hall of Shame... by asking a question like tihs.

Have I said yet that EVERY FAMILY IS DIFFERENT? I once visited a friend's home in Germany. She gave me the full tour of their large home; at one point we went into a suite of rooms with an older lady who was introduced to me as Nanny. Nanny was retired, and like an Oma, was living with the family during her last years.

I know expats who live in Asia, and have a nanny because they feel that it supports the local economy to hire a local, even if they would never consider having a nanny in their country of origin.

A few posters here have pointed out why they need a nanny along - for health reasons (either the parent or the child)

While I empathize for those who are childless not by choice, I do not think that they are able to judge what works for your family, Jen. None of us are. You know best. (And let me say that I have the deepest respect for MG - that post just threw me off)

Are all the parents who use kids clubs to have a few hours alone by definition candidates for the Parenting Hall of Shame? of course not!!!

And if you need a Disney take on the situation - 'O'hana means family. Family means nobody gets left behind'. If your Nanny is considered family, by all means take her along.

 

[castleri]

I am thinking about for the first time, taking my children's babysitter with us on our WDW vaca so that we don't have to do all the work. My son will just turn 4 and my daughter will almost be 2. I spend time with the babysitter now, like lunch and talking when we get home, but am not sure about going cross country. I think it would work out, but need some feedback from my fellow disers. TIA!

Maybe you should try taking her to the California vacation first to see how things work out. If she is a preschool teacher will she be able to get time off and be able to afford to lose the pay from that. There are many considerations here besides the fact that you want someone to help with the work that two children that age can create. As someone said you would have to be very careful to spell out what you expect from her and what she will be able to do and experience while on this trip with you. If her job is to keep track of the 18 month old while you, your husband and son do the rides I would think it wouldn't be all that much of an appealing thing for her. We traveled with children about that same age and there were really no rides the 4 year old could do that the 15 month couldn't. Of course the 4 year old didn't want any part of roller coasters so that made some difference.
Whatever you decide I hope it works out for all of you - if you don't take her maybe you can enroll the children in the children's program at one of the resorts and get your pool time or night out then.

 

[Boardwalker]

I think you should ask the Nanny/babysitter if he/she would consider coming along, letting them know what you expect from them, and then allowing them to decide.
I am very involved in raising a cousin's family. I have been caring for their 4kids for fourteen years, I love them like my own, but am so happy when my day is over. (I have been through 3rd grade homework 5 fives, and it really is getting harder every time.)
I'm not your typical nanny, I don't need the money, I need the kids, so my position may not be typical, but ...
The family has asked me to go with them on vacation several times. I have always declined.
Sometimes I think the kids need more parent time than they need me time. Then I tell them I am busy.
Sometimes I think the parents need more alone time than they need kid time.
I will care for the kids while the parents go off for time alone.
I even take the baby overnight while the parents and older kids go do big kid things so that no one feel short changed.
And sometimes I need time away to adjust my perspective.
I just think you should let the nanny/babysitter decide. If they would rather have the time off, you can always use the onsite inroom sitters (fairy godmothers was it?) or group settings for the time you want to have alone.
No judgements, just a view from a different angle.

 

[Amy5000]

Jen, I'll bet that you didn't realize that you would open yourself up to nominations to the Disboards Parenting Hall of Shame... by asking a question like tihs.

I liked that one bavaria...

Jen:

I started to write along email about my experience occasionally traveling with an au pair. But I've cut it short to this:

I've brought 2 au pairs to the shore for beach vacations (along with my parents and bro, etc). It was nice to have an extra set of hands and I loved that 2 or 3 times I left my DS and DD with the au pair and got to go to a real grown up dinner and know the kids were with someone I can trust. Although we probably won't have the opportunity, I would consider bringing an au pair on a beach vacation again. (Things are very laid back. We mostly just hang out at the beach or take a nap). Au pair can come with us or take time to herself, but it's relatively low stress (well...as low stress as any trip with my impulsive DS). And it's low additional cost to us...just some extra food...

Although our au pairs are great, when DH and I are around, our children prefer us. (Strangely, even tho' I've worked part time (and DH full time) since they were born, they still know we are mommy and daddy). Even when your sitter is there, you will probably have a hard time relaxing b/c your kids probably won't let you. (If you are at the pool with your sitter, your kids will likely continually come to you even if super attentive sitter is there).

If you bring your younger DD to MK or another WDW park with older DS and then try to have sitter deal with her when you go on rides...Well, I'll tell you my younger DD would pitch a fit we got on a line with older DS and said "[au pair] is taking you to Toon Town." She wants to be with Mommy and Daddy and older DS. (my kids are 22 mos. apart). How do you expect to handle that type of situation? (Of course it would great if she could take your DD when she naps in a stroller and you could be off with DS...).

On a more active vacation I found it harder b/c I had to consider the au pair's needs too. (I know...how annoying... ) Is she having a good time? Did she get to go on the ride she wanted? If you are anyone who likes your au pair/nanny/sitter enough to bring on vacation, these will be things you think about.

We are planning a trip to Disney sans au pair (we are not getting another and we have a 4 yo DS and 2 yo DD). I know it will be very hard for me to leave my children at a kids club. Both my DS and DD have a hard time adjusting to new people/places in short time spans, so I expect that we will not have any real adult time. I'm sure there will be at least one or two times during the trip where everything is so difficult that I will regret not bringing an extra set of hands. (As I'm typing this I'm having a night mare just thinking of DS wandering off... it's happened and it's terrifying).

Sorry for the tome...just my thoughts...

 

[DisDee]

I'll try to answer your question from a different point of view. My DD works as a nanny for a family in which both parents are broadway proformers with a very hectic performance schedule. She has traveled with them in the past, but only while they were performing in other cities. She keeps telling me that she would love to travel to WDW with them, and show their daughter all the rides and attractions that she loves so much. Granted, my DD has been there many times and knows her way around which would be extremely helpful to a family who hasn't visited as often. She has a great relationship with the family, is invited to their home for social occasions, etc.

So, I guess what I'm trying to say is go for it! Take your sitter/nanny with you, but by all means spell out the expectaions in advance, make your ADR's for you and dh and have a blast! Hopefully my comments might help!