Do you factor differently for a second wedding? How about if it is a small, very low key outside wedding? I am stumped on what to give a good friend.
Do you factor differently for a second wedding? How about if it is a small, very low key outside wedding? I am stumped on what to give a good friend.
I've never heard of not giving a gift. You show up empty handed? What about birthday parties?I've never heard of giving gifts for 2nd weddings, so yes, I would give much less to a 2nd wedding (my families' 2nd marriages have not even had "weddings" - they were normally weekend solo getaways by the couple to a justice of the peace - no fanfare, no invites, etc)...
Edit: Etiquette agrees with me - phew...https://www.thespruce.com/is-a-gift-appropriate-for-a-second-wedding-1216870
I had a second wedding. My guests gave us giftsI've never heard of giving gifts for 2nd weddings, so yes, I would give much less to a 2nd wedding (my families' 2nd marriages have not even had "weddings" - they were normally weekend solo getaways by the couple to a justice of the peace - no fanfare, no invites, etc)...
Edit: Etiquette agrees with me - phew...https://www.thespruce.com/is-a-gift-appropriate-for-a-second-wedding-1216870
I'm with you. I choose what I'd like to give the couple based upon my relationship with them. I'd give more to a relative or long-time friend, less to a co-worker.I never say the stupid cover your plate thing. My opinion is buy what you feel right and can afford off the registry. Our registry has a drastic span of items so that everyone attending can pick something they feel comfortable with. I didn't even want to do a registry as the whole thing felt wrong but my future sister-in-law said people would buy stuff even if we said not to so why not at least guide them towards stuff we actually want haha.
Thing is, I've never known ahead of time whether the couple was planning a fancy spread like you describe or a more modest meal. I'm not sure how you could politely ask, "Just how fancy's your wedding going to be?" without sounding insulting or condescending. (And it's ware, not wear.)LOL brides don't tell people what the wedding cost, but if there is a full cocktail hour with a raw bar, carving stations, passed hor d'oeuvres, and then a 5 course meal followed by a Venetian table, you know it was much more than $100 a plate (and I've never been to a wedding with plastic wear).
I just priced out a normal wedding reception at a venue a few miles from me, $160 pp, not including DJ, flowers, photography, limo, invitations...just your average reception.
Yeah, more than $100 would be pretty much unheard of -- except maybe from a parent or grandparent. Personally, I never give money; first because I can get always choose a nice gift that looks like it cost more than it actually did; second because I still have gifts from my showers/wedding 27 years ago that I still use, and they make me remember the wedding/the giver -- money, while certainly nice, is used, gone and forgotten.I want to get remarried and invite you all to my wedding for these big monetary gifts!!!! We got married 9 years ago and the largest cash gift was $100 from my Grandma. Most people gave us $25-50. We also had a gift table and I would say we were about 50/50 on money gifts and registry gifts.
When you go out to eat, you have some idea on what the cost is going to be, based on the restaurant. It's the same with weddings. BTW, I realize it's ware, not wear (and it's nice that you don't want to sound insulting or condescending...)I'm with you. I choose what I'd like to give the couple based upon my relationship with them. I'd give more to a relative or long-time friend, less to a co-worker.
Thing is, I've never known ahead of time whether the couple was planning a fancy spread like you describe or a more modest meal. I'm not sure how you could politely ask, "Just how fancy's your wedding going to be?" without sounding insulting or condescending. (And it's ware, not wear.)
Yeah, more than $100 would be pretty much unheard of -- except maybe from a parent or grandparent. Personally, I never give money; first because I can get always choose a nice gift that looks like it cost more than it actually did; second because I still have gifts from my showers/wedding 27 years ago that I still use, and they make me remember the wedding/the giver -- money, while certainly nice, is used, gone and forgotten.