Family not excited, looking for recommendations

[Darth Insidious]

They have increased capacity so while at this point in time you need to make park reservations, looking at next week (Presidents Day week), there are only 3 yellow days. One of those days MK and DHS is out of park reservations, the other 2 days it's just MK. Once the dining window opens, I'd make placeholder park reservations and then you can probably play around with it and have some flexibility. Hopefully by next year reservations are just *recommended* and given prioritization but not required.

Good point. It might be easier to be flexible.

 

[Darth Insidious]

You can book ADR's at the 60+ length of your stay. Disney changed the rules so you can now cancel most of them 2 hours ahead. Even if just a few of you show up they do not charge the fee. Having a nice sit down lunch at your first park and then hop to what you want with park hopper tickets. That gives you flexibility and the ability to be in air conditioning with your family at the heat of the day. In my experience animal kingdom is a ghost town later in the day plan on doing all of your must do rides after 3pm. The lines are much shorter. Staying at Shades of Green will give you access to Extended Evenings. They are wonderful and not crowded. You can get the trill rides done with little wait in those parks. I would try to book a fireworks package on the nights of extended hours as you will be watching the fireworks and it would be nice to be away from the crowds. Lastly I would just assume that you are not doing rope drop. It's too hard on a family with young kids to go from early morning too late night and the extended evenings are wonderful. Sleep in....

Thank you. I’m definitely ruling out rope drop. I was going to try to stick to like 10-6 time frame but after hearing everyone talk about the evening hours, maybe we will try to shift the youngest to stay up late. It’s not uncommon for her to want to stay up til 10 or 11.

 

[Darth Insidious]

Walt Disney Presents is usually pretty chill. That's my designated emergency quiet spot at the Studios when I need to decompress, it's rarely if ever crowded especially in the back area where the theater is.

OP, I'm not sure if your husband would be amenable to it but my #1 tip for navigating the parks as someone who struggles with overstimulation (ADHD/anxiety/C-PTSD and my partner has the same) is noise canceling headphones. I wear my AirPods Pro a lot at the parks because of the transparency feature that allows you to toggle the ANC. But even with the ANC on, if you're not playing music you can still hear what's going on around you, it just takes the edge off so to speak. On bad brain days it's a lifesaver for me.

It *is* doable though, please don't let people scare you. Every day people enjoy the parks with these kinds of challenges. Tbh I would ask on the DISabilities board or look for tips geared towards people with autism because there's a fair bit of crossover with these different conditions and coping mechanisms for one can be helpful for others.

Thank you for the suggestions. I appreciate the encouragement. He wants to go but it’s hard for him!

The idea that was presented that I’m forcing him to do something bad for him or doing something horrible to him is hurtful. My family has been struggling with his PTSD for a long time. We make sacrifices because of it all the time. I am not at all insensitive to that. I invite him if we go to the mall or movies but it’s fine if he doesn’t go. Disney is the same but he wants to go, so I’m trying to do everything I can to make it better for him. But we deserve a vacation too! The 6 yo is really looking forward to it. The other two are happy about some parts but understandably not interested in others, so I’m trying to figure out a way to make all of them happy.

 

[Darth Insidious]

We've had luck doing the horseback rides last minute during times that aren't terribly busy. I'll also say that just checking out the stables (free and never busy) is nice too. Your little one might enjoy the pony rides. We did that last spring break when we needed a break from the crowds.

Thank you. She would definitely love a pony ride

 

[RoseGold]

The idea that was presented that I’m forcing him to do something bad for him or doing something horrible to him is hurtful. My family has been struggling with his PTSD for a long time. We make sacrifices because of it all the time. I am not at all insensitive to that. I invite him if we go to the mall or movies but it’s fine if he doesn’t go. Disney is the same but he wants to go, so I’m trying to do everything I can to make it better for him. But we deserve a vacation too!

There's a lot between not going and a ten day WDW trip, which sounds like my nightmare and I don't have PTSD.

Another option would be BBB in Disney Springs, which I do think will reopen. Go arrival day, have a chill dinner. That would eliminate a park day and be a much more chill way to do a princess makeover without park tickets. Cobble a princess bun back together for two days in the parks, and then leave WDW to go somewhere actually relaxing.

 

[MousetersInc]

I'd missed that you were proposing 10 days. I have some "pro and con" thoughts about that length, and then I can recount some of our experiences.

• Yes, that's a very generous, maybe too generous amount of time. Con: you can definitely do WDW in less.
• On the other hand, PRO: having more time takes some pressure off of individual days. You can spend just a few hours in parks per day and still "do everything." You don't need to feel that a time-out or a ride being down is a missed opportunity.
• But then, CON, if cost starts becoming an option, trimming days is the easiest way to manage it. Because the overall budget is tickets plus lodging plus food. PRO, tickets get cheaper and cheaper per day as your stay gets longer. But CON lodging doesn't so much, and food sure doesn't!
• If you already take vacations of this length as a family then you know your own dynamic, so YMMV. But CON no matter where you are, 10 days might be long enough in one place that any destination gets a bit old. My extended family goes to the beach for a week every year, and it follows a certain cadence. The first days are "OMG I missed you how have you been this is so fun beach beach beach!" Day 2 or 3, everybody's gotten sunburned and run out of energy and is lying around. And then around days 5/6, people are really starting to get on each other's nerves and offend each other, so the trip ends just in time to avoid any seriously hurt feelings. Now, if you were planning to pad the trip with Universal, Sea World, Legoland, etc., then you might never run out of things to do, but even at WDW people might get... dare I say it... bored.

Our first visit was 6 days (minus travel), without park hoppers. We did one day for each of the four parks, plus re-visits to AK and MK. That length let us do almost everything—there were still one or two rides we just didn't see a good wait time for—and take some "timeouts." We had sit-down dinners every day, including padding an AK day with a lengthy Jiko dinner. We spent an afternoon in the pool. We still went pretty hard; I could see expanding that trip to 7 or 8 days to put more breathing room in it. But if you spend some time splitting up, with the enthusiasts going into the park and the chillaxers staying by the pool, you might be able to accomodate everyone in a shorter stay.

Another topic: dates of visit. BEWAAAAARE of Presidents' Day! Less so next year. This year it's a big deal because Mardi Gras falls on the same week, as well as a marathon and some other stuff. See https://www.disneytouristblog.com/crowd-predictions-presidents-day-mardi-gras-disney-world/. But note that article also says last year's Presidents' Day was surprisingly high.

February outside of President's Day is generally a nice low time. So is January, outside of New Years and MLK. I don't know if you're planning around a school holiday, but I encourage you to consider MLK. For our schools, Presidents' Day is only one day off, but MLK was two. We went just a few weeks ago for MLK week and I think we made the right choice. Crowds were higher I'm sure than in the other weeks of January, but much lower than what I saw in the first visit, which was Spring Break. And there was more drop-off in the Tue and Wed following the actual holiday.

Finally, one more suggestion: Do you enjoy all this planning? Me, I eat it up. A big part of the enjoyment of the trip for me is vicariously experiencing it in advance. But it's not for all (and it's hard these days!). You might consider engaging an approved Disney planner or travel agent. They don't add anything to your cost. And the fact is, you can't do WDW "unplanned"; the kindest thing us planner-types can do for the unplanner-types is either take the burden of plans off them, or better yet, make as many flexible plans as possible; when somebody says "We're bored, what can we do," have the knowledge to say "Well, park A closes in an hour so don't go there, but we have Extended Entry at park B. There's a show over here, and an activity over there." Maybe don't pay for anything you don't have to in advance, like ILL$; you can make that decision during your stay. You will have to reserve (and in some cases pay for) things that are "must-dos" for one person or other, like Cinderella's Royal Table. But you can still leave a lot not-set-in-stone.

 

[T.G.I.Friday]

Thank you. I have considered it (and still am). It’s a lot of money but I could do it in place of all the other stuff. I couldn’t really do both (after hours, fireworks cruise, etc plus the VIP tour). I’m kicking around the idea of this and then as you said the rest of the time re-ride favorites, let the little one meet characters, go to show, etc.

What do mean by shielding him from the crowd? I know the sometimes take shortcuts and will drive between parks. Anything that gets him out of crowds is a win for us. I know it’s Disney so there are going to be crowds but I definitely appreciate any tips!

It’s hard for me to explain, but I find navigating many walkways at Disney to be stressful. It’s crowded, you are trying to get where you are going, and you want to look around and enjoy it, but you have to be so alert to everyone around you. People randomly darting in front of you or stopping dead in their tracks. Other times people walking straight at you in some crazy game of chicken.

The tour guide takes the brunt of it. They lead, know where they are going and how to best get there, so you are able to walk along with them and take in the sights without needing to be hyper vigilant. Also, this would be an interesting social experiment, but whether it’s the uniform or their confident posture, crowds seem to part around them. People seem to give the tour groups a wide berth. It’s weird.

Add in the transportation between parks and even sometimes between the rides in Epcot, and it takes so much stress away.

I know it is expensive and would mean skipping most of the other extras, but I really feel like it would be a game changer for your husband and allow him to maybe enjoy the parks a little more.

 

[RoseGold]

It’s hard for me to explain, but I find navigating many walkways at Disney to be stressful. It’s crowded, you are trying to get where you are going, and you want to look around and enjoy it, but you have to be so alert to everyone around you. People randomly darting in front of you or stopping dead in their tracks. Other times people walking straight at you in some crazy game of chicken.

Yes, and I feel like this has gotten much worse since Covid. I travel with a wheelchair-bound relative, so I am really sensitive to this.

The weirdest thing about visiting after the hurricane was that there were almost no scooters. It was like everyone canceled them? It was finally easy to navigate. But generally speaking, scooters are everywhere, no one can drive them because of what they are. Strollers, scooters, photos, slower people, kids melting down, someone on the phone, someone filming their TikTok dance, someone eating on a trash can, it's a lot just getting around WDW. It's like no one has any idea how or where to walk on a giant path. And that's everywhere, all of the time. You can see this if you go watch some recent Youtubers in the parks. The crowd is very much chaos.

 

[Darth Insidious]

I'd missed that you were proposing 10 days. I have some "pro and con" thoughts about that length, and then I can recount some of our experiences.

• Yes, that's a very generous, maybe too generous amount of time. Con: you can definitely do WDW in less.
• On the other hand, PRO: having more time takes some pressure off of individual days. You can spend just a few hours in parks per day and still "do everything." You don't need to feel that a time-out or a ride being down is a missed opportunity.
• But then, CON, if cost starts becoming an option, trimming days is the easiest way to manage it. Because the overall budget is tickets plus lodging plus food. PRO, tickets get cheaper and cheaper per day as your stay gets longer. But CON lodging doesn't so much, and food sure doesn't!
• If you already take vacations of this length as a family then you know your own dynamic, so YMMV. But CON no matter where you are, 10 days might be long enough in one place that any destination gets a bit old. My extended family goes to the beach for a week every year, and it follows a certain cadence. The first days are "OMG I missed you how have you been this is so fun beach beach beach!" Day 2 or 3, everybody's gotten sunburned and run out of energy and is lying around. And then around days 5/6, people are really starting to get on each other's nerves and offend each other, so the trip ends just in time to avoid any seriously hurt feelings. Now, if you were planning to pad the trip with Universal, Sea World, Legoland, etc., then you might never run out of things to do, but even at WDW people might get... dare I say it... bored.

Our first visit was 6 days (minus travel), without park hoppers. We did one day for each of the four parks, plus re-visits to AK and MK. That length let us do almost everything—there were still one or two rides we just didn't see a good wait time for—and take some "timeouts." We had sit-down dinners every day, including padding an AK day with a lengthy Jiko dinner. We spent an afternoon in the pool. We still went pretty hard; I could see expanding that trip to 7 or 8 days to put more breathing room in it. But if you spend some time splitting up, with the enthusiasts going into the park and the chillaxers staying by the pool, you might be able to accomodate everyone in a shorter stay.

Another topic: dates of visit. BEWAAAAARE of Presidents' Day! Less so next year. This year it's a big deal because Mardi Gras falls on the same week, as well as a marathon and some other stuff. See https://www.disneytouristblog.com/crowd-predictions-presidents-day-mardi-gras-disney-world/. But note that article also says last year's Presidents' Day was surprisingly high.

February outside of President's Day is generally a nice low time. So is January, outside of New Years and MLK. I don't know if you're planning around a school holiday, but I encourage you to consider MLK. For our schools, Presidents' Day is only one day off, but MLK was two. We went just a few weeks ago for MLK week and I think we made the right choice. Crowds were higher I'm sure than in the other weeks of January, but much lower than what I saw in the first visit, which was Spring Break. And there was more drop-off in the Tue and Wed following the actual holiday.

Finally, one more suggestion: Do you enjoy all this planning? Me, I eat it up. A big part of the enjoyment of the trip for me is vicariously experiencing it in advance. But it's not for all (and it's hard these days!). You might consider engaging an approved Disney planner or travel agent. They don't add anything to your cost. And the fact is, you can't do WDW "unplanned"; the kindest thing us planner-types can do for the unplanner-types is either take the burden of plans off them, or better yet, make as many flexible plans as possible; when somebody says "We're bored, what can we do," have the knowledge to say "Well, park A closes in an hour so don't go there, but we have Extended Entry at park B. There's a show over here, and an activity over there." Maybe don't pay for anything you don't have to in advance, like ILL$; you can make that decision during your stay. You will have to reserve (and in some cases pay for) things that are "must-dos" for one person or other, like Cinderella's Royal Table. But you can still leave a lot not-set-in-stone.

Thank you. Yes, it’s because we have a week off of school that week.

I LOVE the planning. I think I just have to plan with the idea of I’m securing us options that they may choose not to do and not get too frustrated about that.

The reason for 10 days is to accommodate his request for no parks arrival/departure days and 3 no park rest days in there. That’s half the length. He’s more concerned about more than 2 consecutive park days and prefers a longer stay with breaks in between for hotel day, tea party, Ft Wilderness, etc. He enjoyed it last time when we had non park days sprinkled in.

 

[Darth Insidious]

It’s hard for me to explain, but I find navigating many walkways at Disney to be stressful. It’s crowded, you are trying to get where you are going, and you want to look around and enjoy it, but you have to be so alert to everyone around you. People randomly darting in front of you or stopping dead in their tracks. Other times people walking straight at you in some crazy game of chicken.

The tour guide takes the brunt of it. They lead, know where they are going and how to best get there, so you are able to walk along with them and take in the sights without needing to be hyper vigilant. Also, this would be an interesting social experiment, but whether it’s the uniform or their confident posture, crowds seem to part around them. People seem to give the tour groups a wide berth. It’s weird.

Add in the transportation between parks and even sometimes between the rides in Epcot, and it takes so much stress away.

I know it is expensive and would mean skipping most of the other extras, but I really feel like it would be a game changer for your husband and allow him to maybe enjoy the parks a little more.

Thank you. Your description sounds like it would really help. I will very strongly consider it and see what his thoughts are.

 

[Dulcee]

Thank you. Yes, it’s because we have a week off of school that week.

I LOVE the planning. I think I just have to plan with the idea of I’m securing us options that they may choose not to do and not get too frustrated about that.

The reason for 10 days is to accommodate his request for no parks arrival/departure days and 3 no park rest days in there. That’s half the length. He’s more concerned about more than 2 consecutive park days and prefers a longer stay with breaks in between for hotel day, tea party, Ft Wilderness, etc. He enjoyed it last time when we had non park days sprinkled in.

We did a trip a few years ago that was 10 days (with 7 day passes) and it was a nice mix for me (who will go all day, do all the things and never stop) and my husband (who would really be happy with a lounge chair and a drink by the pool the entire trip). I was willing to mellow out because we had more time and he was willing to get up and go if he knew the next day would be more relaxed. Some days we'd go into a park for only a few hours and spend the rest doing things like the stables, mini golf or boating. Overall our kids were happier too with getting more sleep then a typical disney trip lol

 

[Darth Insidious]

We did a trip a few years ago that was 10 days (with 7 day passes) and it was a nice mix for me (who will go all day, do all the things and never stop) and my husband (who would really be happy with a lounge chair and a drink by the pool the entire trip). I was willing to mellow out because we had more time and he was willing to get up and go if he knew the next day would be more relaxed. Some days we'd go into a park for only a few hours and spend the rest doing things like the stables, mini golf or boating. Overall our kids were happier too with getting more sleep then a typical disney trip lol

Thank you. One of the times he liked last time was 3 hours at HS. Indiana Jones show, dinner, and Fantasmic. That was it but for him that was ideal.

I think you’re right about mellowing out. I’m focused on how many days will it take to do it this way with everyone’s requests. Maybe I need to pick length of stay and then work in their requests.

 

[Darth Insidious]

Yes, and I feel like this has gotten much worse since Covid. I travel with a wheelchair-bound relative, so I am really sensitive to this.

The weirdest thing about visiting after the hurricane was that there were almost no scooters. It was like everyone canceled them? It was finally easy to navigate. But generally speaking, scooters are everywhere, no one can drive them because of what they are. Strollers, scooters, photos, slower people, kids melting down, someone on the phone, someone filming their TikTok dance, someone eating on a trash can, it's a lot just getting around WDW. It's like no one has any idea how or where to walk on a giant path. And that's everywhere, all of the time. You can see this if you go watch some recent Youtubers in the parks. The crowd is very much chaos.

Yeah. Thanks for sharing. That stuff is likely to be very frustrating for him. Someone said AK after 3. I’m thinking World Showcase on a weekday. Anything that would cut this down some.

 

[Mackenzie Click-Mickelson]

Thank you. One of the times he liked last time was 3 hours at HS. Indiana Jones show, dinner, and Fantasmic. That was it but for him that was ideal.

I think you’re right about mellowing out. I’m focused on how many days will it take to do it this way with everyone’s requests. Maybe I need to pick length of stay and then work in their requests.

I just want to say you def. are trying to think of everyone's needs at the same time, it can be really hard to balance any of that out without additional challenges. Just don't forget to take a moment for you to enjoy the trip

 

[Darth Insidious]

I just want to say you def. are trying to think of everyone's needs at the same time, it can be really hard to balance any of that out without additional challenges. Just don't forget to take a moment for you to enjoy the trip

Thank you! Galaxy’s Edge day is definitely for me. I’m a HUGE Star Wars dork. My son is excited and the girls want to dress up since he and I are (Star Wars inspired outfits not legit costumes). With 5 of us likely hitting Smuggler’s Run at least twice, I’m definitely piloting the Falcon! I think my husband will even enjoy it some but even if everyone else stays at the hotel, I’m dressing up and building my light saber, lol!

I was taking of doing the BBB makeover and CRT for little one day one and Galaxy’s edge day two and if they want to sort of wing it from there, I’ll have some fun stuff reserved or we can skip it. Character meals are my plan for both together time and for the little one. Then they can all nap/swim/whatever while I take whoever wants to go for the planned activities.

 

[MousetersInc]

Thank you. Yes, it’s because we have a week off of school that week.

I LOVE the planning. I think I just have to plan with the idea of I’m securing us options that they may choose not to do and not get too frustrated about that.

The reason for 10 days is to accommodate his request for no parks arrival/departure days and 3 no park rest days in there. That’s half the length. He’s more concerned about more than 2 consecutive park days and prefers a longer stay with breaks in between for hotel day, tea party, Ft Wilderness, etc. He enjoyed it last time when we had non park days sprinkled in.

Ahhh. Yeah, I'm actually with him on "no parks arrival day," though I know others are into it. For us, we flew, even a short 3-hr flight from NC. We woke up at like 4am to go to the airport, saying we could sleep on the flight. We checked into Wilderness Lodge and went on to AK, leaving at dinner time. But even that shortened day, after only a 3-hr flight, had us dragging. The next day we just didn't have the strength to make it from Space Mtn to Big Thunder Mtn. I've got a picture of everybody slumped in a heap in Liberty Square.

And then departure day, we visited the park for a half day before flying out, but of course it has you worrying about timing and making sure you'll get to your plane on time.

But as long as the party is comfortable splitting up, the "interior" non-park days could be park days for some.

 

[kylenne]

Thank you for the suggestions. I appreciate the encouragement. He wants to go but it’s hard for him!

The idea that was presented that I’m forcing him to do something bad for him or doing something horrible to him is hurtful. My family has been struggling with his PTSD for a long time. We make sacrifices because of it all the time. I am not at all insensitive to that. I invite him if we go to the mall or movies but it’s fine if he doesn’t go. Disney is the same but he wants to go, so I’m trying to do everything I can to make it better for him. But we deserve a vacation too! The 6 yo is really looking forward to it. The other two are happy about some parts but understandably not interested in others, so I’m trying to figure out a way to make all of them happy.

Believe me, I understand. Unfortunately there is a lot of casual ableism on these boards sometimes. Mostly unintentional, because I absolutely believe that people generally mean well, but sometimes there is an air of "if you can't do things exactly like an abled person could then don't bother to go" and a lack of understanding about invisible disabilities as well. We just have to do a little more planning than most, and it means listening to our bodies and being flexible enough to drop a planned activity if we are feeling overwhelmed.

If you are open to moving your dates, early May is great, the weather is nice and crowd levels are still fairly low because spring break is over but school is not quite out yet. I find routine is very important to keep stress levels down. I still practice the same mindfulness exercises that I do at home. Your plan to go slower and over a longer period is a solid one I think. 10 days sounds like a long time but our upcoming trip is 11 and we only plan on rope dropping a couple of days, taking advantage of afternoon LL stacking and Extended Evening Hours since we will be at the Poly is going to be our strategy. Crowds are a big anxiety trigger for my partner but she has a great time because we take it easy and know how to avoid them. In the past that meant things like dessert parties for the fireworks. I agree with PPs that if you can afford to do so a VIP tour sounds like it would be a great fit for your family, and booking one would give you access to DSS assistance. I would explain the situation to them at the time of booking. I would also strongly recommend you skip rope dropping entirely, those crowds are insane now.

Quieter areas in the parks are important for breaks even during minimal park time. If push comes to shove, don't be afraid to go to First Aid. They have quiet, dimly lit spaces to sit if you need them and I have used them when overdoing it in the past, the nurses are always very accommodating. Disney actually publishes a guide to quieter areas in the parks though, it can be downloaded here: https://disneyworld.disney.go.com/guest-services/cognitive-disabilities-services/
There is also a guide to attractions on that page, explaining what kind of stimuli are involved in different ones (such as loud noises, sudden drops, etc) though it's a bit outdated.

You mentioned your kids and World Showcase, I would strongly advise to avoid it Fri-Sun as the locals are out in force during festivals (which is like all the time now) and this is peak "Drunkcot" time with crowds and rowdy guests. Linger after the nighttime shows to let the crowds thin out before leaving. In general keeping a slower pace and zigging while others are zagging is key. Also agree to make sure your needs are being met as well.

 

[sandam1]

I just want to say you def. are trying to think of everyone's needs at the same time, it can be really hard to balance any of that out without additional challenges. Just don't forget to take a moment for you to enjoy the trip

Yeah, I was just going to comment on the same thing. I know that your husband wants some "non-park days," but maybe consider taking one of those days for yourself and plan your own ideal day while Dad watches the kids.

I would recommend talking to your husband (and to some extent the older kids) and come to an agreement on ground rules that everyone can agree to for the trip - i.e. we do this much planning and do this much "on the fly," these are the must-dos, how much "I don't want to do this, but I won't complain because someone else does" you are asking for, etc.

Also, are you comfortable letting your oldest (or the older two together) do some things on their own? That might get them excited if they can do their own research and come up with their own plans for their time.

Just a few more suggestions! Good luck!

 

[RoseGold]

Believe me, I understand. Unfortunately there is a lot of casual ableism on these boards sometimes. Mostly unintentional, because I absolutely believe that people generally mean well, but sometimes there is an air of "if you can't do things exactly like an abled person could then don't bother to go" and a lack of understanding about invisible disabilities as well.

LOL, casual ableism. I don't personally know anyone, including myself, who would want to be at WDW that long. And I'm a superfan. I'd say the same thing for any reluctant person being dragged on a ten day WDW slog. Especially if it's five people in a hotel room the whole time, which I think it is? OP's husband has a lot of legit reasons why this is not a great pick for him, so I can't even wrap my brain around staying that long.

And yes, Disney superfans drag a lot of non-Disney people around who don't want to go or probably shouldn't go for many reasons. The pixie dust is strong.

There's a lot in between dragging the whole family for 10 days and not going.

 

[CAPSLOCK]

Once we moved those to the top of the backpack (presumably so it was a more clear defined shape) had zero issues.

Or because if someone is planning to sneak something into a park, they put it in the bag first then layer all the mundane things on top to hide it during a physical search...